


Mystery Cousins

by Acaeria



Series: Cousins AU [2]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe, Gen, Kidnapping, Monsters, but its gravity falls so what were you expecting?, i'll add more warnings as it goes along, kind of
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-16
Updated: 2016-09-06
Packaged: 2018-08-09 04:51:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 30,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7787434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Acaeria/pseuds/Acaeria
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“So,” he said, dragging out the word, “You’re Ford’s…?”<br/>“Apprentice,” Dipper filled in for him. “I’m his apprentice.”<br/>//<br/>“Who’s this?”<br/>“That’s my daughter-”<br/>“You have a daughter?” Ford sounded bewildered.</p><p>June 1992; Stanley Pines turns up on his brother's doorstep with a daughter and nothing to his name.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Welcome to Gravity Falls

Stan slammed the trunk shut and stomped around to the front of the car, climbing into the front seat. As the door thudded shut Sarah’s screaming faded out, dulled by the walls of his trusty old El Diablo. To drown out the last of it, he reached forward and turned the radio on, cranking the volume up until he couldn’t hear her screeching anymore.

Beside him, Mabel was huddled on the passenger seat, her seatbelt on and her entire body encompassed in a self-made sweater. Her eyes were fixed on her feet, her knees huddled to her chest. Blood seeped from a cut near her eye. 

“You okay, sweetie?” he asked her. She nodded, but didn’t look at him. Stan sighed. “We’ll stop at the pharmacy and pick up some stuff for that cut, and then we’ll be outta here.” Mabel nodded again. Stan watched concernedly as she moved her lips soundlessly, before finally uttering the question:   
“Where will we go?”

Stan paused for a moment, considering. “We’ll figure something out,” he said, and glanced away, beginning to pull out of the driveway. 

“Are we gonna have to live with Nana?” Mabel asked. Stan sighed, shook his head.

“I don’t think that will happen, sweetie.”

“Can we afford to buy someplace?” 

Stan glanced at her. “What are you worrying your big ol’ head about money for?” he asked amusedly. 

“I don’t want to go away again,” Mabel mumbled. Stan’s hands tightened on the steering wheel, his amusement fading.

“Neither of us wants that,” he told her. Behind them, their (old, now) house faded into the distance. The country lane was quiet, the outskirts of town still a minute or two away. Stan grasped for ideas, trying to think of somewhere, anywhere they could stay for a while. Unfortunately, his list of acquaintances either hated him, were dead, or had nowhere of their own to stay- or all three. He bit his lip worriedly and glanced down at Mabel, who was staring out of her window, her face turned away from him. He couldn’t lose her again.

He sighed. The lights of Piedmont blinked to life around the car. In his mind, he came across what may be his only solution. “How about,” he said to Mabel as they pulled into the pharmacy parking lot, “We go and stay with my brother.”

Mabel glanced over at him and blinked; in the dim light, he couldn’t tell if she was blinking away tears or not. “You... have a brother?”

* * *

Dipper was curled up on the chair, engrossed in his latest mystery novel, when Ford emerged from the basement. He glanced up from his book and noted the manic grin and slitted pupils, and his grip on the book tightened. He stayed still, barely daring to breathe, wondering if the demon had noticed he was there.

“Hey, kid!” 

He had.

“Hey, Bill,” Dipper greeted, watching as Bill grabbed a crossbow from the wall and stuffed it in a backpack that was far too small for it. “Going somewhere?”

“Old Fordsey has some errands that need attending too,” Bill told him, grabbing one of the many knives that were jammed into the wall. “So I’ll be doing that. It shouldn’t be too dangerous, so don’t wait up for me!” Dipper nodded.

“Uh, okay then.”

“See ya, kid!” Bill waved, and then was gone, slamming the door behind him. Dipper waited until his footsteps had faded away and then gave a relieved sigh, leaning back over the arm of the chair and staring up at the wooden ceiling. It was covered in lines, natural marks and knife welts and writings and diagrams. There was a hole in it from where the wood had rotted away, and it had fallen through when Ford had walked on it. 

It was as he was trying to decipher what looked like some latin scribbles when he heard the unmistakable sound of a car pulling up outside. He jumped up immediately and made his way to the window, which was mostly boarded up. He glanced through gaps in the wood to see an unfamiliar car parked there, and found himself shivering with anxiety.

Nobody ever came to Ford’s house. Well, that wasn’t  _ quite _ true- sometimes the postman would deliver a letter, or Fiddleford, Ford’s old college friend and lab assistant, would come to visit (he and Ford had fallen out a long time ago; he only ever came up now to check on Dipper, and make sure he knew the offer to come and live with him still stood at any given time). The most visits they got were from kids and teenagers from town, who heard spooky stories about their old house and came to check it out, and even that happened rarely.

As he watched, the car door opened, and a man got out; tall and broad-shouldered, wearing a jacket and jeans. Through the dirty glass and from a distance, Dipper couldn’t quite make out his face, even when he turned toward the house. At one point, the man’s eyes seemed to meet Dipper’s, and he ducked down, heart hammering in his chest.

Dipper sat there against the wall, listening as another car door opened, and footsteps made their way towards the front door. As they grew closer, he began to make out voices, quiet words.

“This place is freaky,” said a feminine voice, sounding rather hesitant. “Are you sure somebody lives here?”

“It’s the right address,” came a gruff voice, presumably that of the man who had exited the car. “May as well try, right?” There came a sharp knocking at the door, the sound of which made Dipper jump even though he was expecting it.

He sat under the window, biting his lip, debating whether to open the door or not. Ford had always told him to be wary of strangers, but had never given him any instructions on what to do if they knocked at the door; it had never happened before. Gravity Falls was a small town, and everyone tended to know everyone.

“Maybe nobody’s home?” the female voice asked again. 

“Maybe,” the man said, but he sounded doubtful. “Damn Stanford,” he muttered, quieter this time. Dipper perked up. They knew Ford.

Surely no harm could come from opening the door?

There was another knock, and Dipper slowly got to his feet, crept over, and opened the door.

The man jumped backwards, his hand raised to knock once more. Beside him was a girl Dipper’s height, swamped in a sweater far too large for her, her hair and a pale sliver of face all that he could make out about her. The man blinked in confusion for a moment, looking somewhere above Dipper’s head, before glancing down.

“Who are you?” he asked gruffly. Dipper hesitated, but then answered,

“I could ask you the same thing.”   
The man sighed. “Look, we’re looking for a Stanford Pines. Do you know him?”   
“Yeah.”

“Well, where is he then?”   
“He’s out. What do you want with him?”

“What do I-” The man sighed. “Look, kid. I’m Stanley Pines, I’m his brother.”

Dipper narrowed his eyes. “Ford never told me about a brother.” The man sighed again.

“Of course he didn’t.”

“You didn’t tell me you had a brother, either,” the girl piped up. Dipper glanced at her again. 

“Who’re you?” he asked, his tone not very polite at all. He winced at the harshness.

“I’m Mabel!” the girl chirped, seeming not to notice. “What’s your name?”

“I’m, uh, Dipper.”

“Well, it’s nice to meet you, uh, Dipper!”

Dipper stared at her and her extended hand. Her smile dropped as she glanced down at it. “You’re supposed to shake it,” she told him. Dipper hesitated, then reached out, and she grabbed his hand, shaking it up and down. “There, see!”

“Uh-huh…”   
“Look, kid,” Stanley sighed. “Can we come in? I don’t know when my brother will be back but I need to talk to him.”

“I don’t know…” Dipper said hesitantly. They seemed genuine enough, but he couldn’t quite shake the notion that they might not be what they seemed. After all, in Gravity Falls…

“Please?” Mabel asked, her eyes wide. “We have nowhere else to go.” Her voice broke on the last word, and he sighed. 

“Fine,” he said, stepping back and opening the door. “Come in. Just don’t- don’t touch anything.”

The two of them entered the room, and stood there as he shut and locked the door behind them. He glanced at them and found that they were both staring around the room, eyes wide with something he couldn’t name. Surprise? Horror, maybe? Mabel reached up and grabbed Stanley’s hand. Stanley whistled.

“Nice, uh, place you got here,” he said. Dipper glanced around at the bare wooden room, the threadbare furniture, the weapons hanging on and stuck into the wall, the papers and books everywhere, the writing on the walls. He shrugged.

“Not really,” he said. Stanley glanced at him.   
“So,” he said, dragging out the word, “You’re Ford’s…?”

“Apprentice,” Dipper filled in for him. “I’m his apprentice.” Stanley frowned.

“Aren’t you a bit young for that?” Dipper shrugged.

“I’m smart. He has nine PhD’s. It works out.”

“Nine? Jesus.” Stanley glanced around again. “Say, is there anywhere we can sit down?” Dipper nodded hesitantly, and lead them to the kitchen. That room didn’t look much better; the table and chairs looked worn-down, the side was piled with dirty dishes and lab equipment, the cupboards were open and empty, and there was a faintly off smell that permeated throughout the room. Mabel scrunched up her nose beside him. 

“Why are all your windows boarded up?” she asked curiously. Dipper glanced over at the windows, which were, as she said, boarded up. He shrugged.

“To keep things out,” he said. She glanced at him, appearing more than a little creeped out.

“O-kaaay…” 

Suddenly there was a bang as the door opened and closed. Everyone in the room jumped.

“Dipper!” Ford called. “Dipper, where are you? There’s a car outside and I’m 80% certain it wasn’t here when I left-” Ford suddenly rounded the corner into the kitchen and froze, staring at its two new occupants.

“Hey, Poindexter,” Stanley said, sounding somewhat more anxious than he had when Dipper answered the door. “Long time no see, eh?”

“Stanley,” Ford said, breathlessly. “What are you doing here?”   
“Yeah, actually, about that, I need to talk to you.  _ Alone _ ,” Stanley added pointedly, glancing at Dipper and Mabel. Ford glanced down at them too, and frowned. 

“Who’s this?”   
“That’s my daughter-”   
“You have a daughter?” Ford sounded bewildered. He crouched down and held his hand out to Mabel. “Hi, I’m Ford,” he introduced himself. “What’s your name, little lady?” Mabel giggled and reached out to shake his hand.

“I’m Mabel!” she introduced herself. She glanced down at their hands and gasped, eyes widening. “Six fingers! That’s like, a whole finger friendlier than normal!” Ford laughed, taken aback, and straightened up.

“Yes, well, he said, holding one hand in the other. “If you kids want to go entertain yourselves for a while, I need to talk with my brother.”   
Mabel hesitated, and glanced over at Stanley.

“Go on,” he told her, and she nodded. Dipper reached out and grabbed her wrist, leading her from the room and out into the hall, the door slamming shut behind them. The two of them stood, staring at each other for a moment.

“I’m gonna…” Mabel pointed down the hall, pulling her arm free. Dipper nodded and watched her go, listening as the front door opened and closed. He sighed and turned to go upstairs- he had no delusions that the conversation in the kitchen would be a short one. He was half the way up when he suddenly froze.

_ Wait… Did Mabel just go outside?! _

* * *

Mabel sat on the hood of the car, a handful of pebbles in one hand. It was colder here than it had been in California, but Mabel didn’t mind too much; she had her sweater, and even if she hadn’t, being outside was at least better than being inside that house. She glanced over at it, a dark imposing wooden structure with boarded-up windows and an overgrown garden. It looked abandoned; how could anyone possibly live in there?

She sighed and threw another pebble into the trees, lost in thought. She hoped the talk between her dad and uncle would be done soon; she hoped Dipper was alright. She wondered how he’d become Ford’s apprentice, and why he’d willingly set foot inside that house; did he live there, or did he have a home in town? If he did live there… why? 

She threw another stone, and somebody yelped, “Ow!” Mabel froze. 

“Uh, is someone there?” she called, hopping down from her perch. There was no response, and she anxiously inched closer. “Hello? I’m really sorry I hit you! Can I help?”

She’d just passed the treeline when a voice replied, “Why, I think you can.”

Mabel spun around, searching for the speaker, and before she knew what was happening, her feet became tangled and she found herself careening towards the ground. She yelped and reached out to catch herself, coming down hard on the forest floor. She blinked in confusion, gasping, and twisted around to see her ankles tangled with… was that string? She turned back in front of her and saw a grinning face, and her face twisted in confusion.

“Wha…?” The tiny man laughed.

“Yes, I think you can help us,” he said, and suddenly, Mabel’s world went black.

* * *

Dipper burst out of the front door and yelled, “Mabel!”

There was no response. Dipper panted as he looked around; everything was quiet and still, nothing changed. Dread crept up on him, but he refused to fall victim to hit. Maybe she was just around the back of the house. He circled the house twice, and by the time he made his way back to the front, the dread had settled in his stomach.

“Oh, no,” he muttered, staring out at the woods. “Oh, crap.”

* * *

Mabel groaned as she came to. Her head was swimming, her vision blurry, and her body was twisted in an uncomfortable position that made everything ache. She tried to move from it, but found that she couldn’t; her eyes snapped open and she glanced down to found that she was tied up, her arms twisted behind her and lashed to a tree, and her ankles tied together.

“Wha…?” she mumbled in confusion and blinked, looking around her. 

Surrounding her was a crowd of small men with pointy hats and bushy beards.

“Aah!” she yelped in horror. 

“Hey, hey, calm down,” said a voice, and one of the men came forwards, hands held out in a placating gesture. “You’re in no danger here.”   
“No?” Mabel asked, pulling at her arms to no avail. “So why am I tied up?”   
“To keep you from running off!” the man said. 

“Yeah, normally when people don’t want you to leave, they’re not doing it with good intentions.”

“Well, our intentions are good!” the man insisted. “I’m Jeff, and we’re the Gravity Falls Gnome Colony. Recently our queen was murdered and we’ve been left without one, and we’ve been looking for someone to fill that gap.”   
“Me?” Mabel asked in bewilderment.

“Yes,  _ you _ !” the gnome insisted. “You would be the most beautiful queen we’ve ever had!” Mabel laughed shakily at that.

“Ha, yeah?” she asked. “Well, maybe it won’t be that bad, being queen of the gnomes. Is there some sort of coronation ceremony, or…?”

“Sure!” Jeff said. “You just need to marry us, and then-”   
“Wait, marriage?” Mabel cried. “I can’t get married!”   
“Why not?” Jeff asked, confused. Then, “Oh, you’re not already married, are you?” He seemed somber.

“N-” Mabel cut herself off, hesitating. “Actually, yes. Yes I am.”

“That’s a real shame,” Jeff said, taking off his hat. “A real shame.” “So, you’ll let me go?” Mabel asked hopefully. 

“What? No.” Jeff glanced up at her, his expression twisted into one of malice. “We’re going to go kill your husband!”   
“Wait,  _ what _ ?!”

“Mabel!” A voice came drifting through the trees. “Mabel, where are you?”

“Dipper!” Mabel yelled. “Dipper, I’m over here!”

“Is that him?” Jeff asked, darkly. Before Mabel could respond, he’d returned his hat to his head and yelled, “Gnomes! Get him!”

“Wait! No!” Mabel cried as the gnomes started to race across the clearing. She watched in horror as they began to climb atop one another, becoming something else, something monstrous…

“Mabel!” Dipper’s voice was closer now. The bushes on the opposite side of the clearing rustled, and he stepped out from the woods.

“Dipper, watch out!” Mabel screamed. Dipper startled, glancing over at her and then up at the gnome-monster, which turned toward him. His mouth formed an ‘o’ of realisation. 

The gnomes lashed out, and Dipper ducked, rolling across the ground, under the arm and towards Mabel.

“Whoa!” Mabel cried as Dipper sprung up and pulled a knife out from seemingly nowhere. He used it to cut through the ropes on her hands and feet, and then tucked it away, holding out a hand to help her up. Mabel took it, jumping to her feet.

“Come on!” Dipper called over the furious roaring of the gnomes. Still holding hands, the two of them took off through the woods, pursued by the giant gnome monster. Finally, they burst through the trees, back at the house. 

“Get inside!” Dipper yelled. “I’ll get the shotgun-”   
“A gun!” Mabel cried, stopping and pulling her hand free of his. “Dipper, you can’t kill them!”   
“Why not?” Dipper asked. “They’ll destroy the house otherwise, Ford and your dad are in there-”

“It’s wrong!” Mabel yelled. Behind them, the monster emerged from the trees. Dipper cursed. 

“We have to do something!” he yelled. 

Mabel nodded, and glanced around, her eyes landing on something sticking out from behind a bin. She raced over and grabbed it, turning it on the gnomes.

“A leaf-blower?!” Dipper stared in astonishment as Mabel switched on the machine, blowing a hole in the gnomes. Dipper’s eyes widened and he raced over to her, grabbing onto the leaf blower. Mabel shifted to the side and the two of them stood, side by side, holding their own as they blew the gnomes away.

Finally, the only one left was Jeff, holding into a tree branch to keep himself in place. “This isn’t the end!” he yelled. “We’ll be back!”   
“Yeah, yeah,” Mabel said. She nodded to Dipper, and he cranked the blower up a notch, and Jeff blew away. 

Dipper turned the blower off, and Mabel dropped it, sighing. She glanced over at Dipper and sighed. “I’m sorry about that,” she apologised. Dipper glanced at her in confusion.

“It wasn’t your fault. I should have warned you about the woods.”

“It’s alright. All’s well that ends well, right?” Dipper gave her a hesitant smile.

“Right.” 

She opened her arms. “Hug?” she asked. Dipper looked confused again. “You know, a hug?” Mabel asked. There was no change in his expression. “You… You’ve never been hugged?” she asked, horrified. He shook his head.

“No…?”

“Well then, you definitely need one,” Mabel said. She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him; he stood stiffly until she let go. He looked awkward.

“I’m sorry…”   
“No, it’s fine,” Mabel said with a smile. “We’ll work on it.” Dipper smiled back.

Behind them, the front door burst open, and Stan emerged from inside. “Hey, kids!” he greeted.

“Hi Dad!” Mabel called. She gave Dipper an apologetic glance and ran over to him. “How did your conversation with Uncle Stanford go?”

“Eh…” He rubbed the back of his head. Mabel deflated with disappointment. “We’re allowed to stay, at least until we get our own place.” Mabel perked up.

“Really? Yay!”

“Haha, yeah.” He ruffled her hair. “Wanna help me get the bags out of the car?” Mabel nodded and followed him around to the trunk, pulling her suitcase out. She turned around to see Stanford waiting at the door, Dipper stood beside him, Ford’s arm wrapped around his shoulders. Stanford’s expression was unreadable, but Dipper was smiling; he caught her eye and gave a small wave.

Mabel waved back and let her gaze travel past him, over the foreboding-looking house and the dark woods. She took in a deep breath of the pine scented air, and smiled, making her way over to her new home.

Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad, after all.

* * *

Night was falling. Dipper handed Stanley- who he’d been told to just call Stan- the spare duvet, standing outside the door of the room that Ford had given him and Mabel to sleep in. “Thanks, Kid,” Stan said gruffly.

“Yeah…” Dipper stepped back as Mabel walked past him into room, dressed in her pyjamas. She smiled at him, and he flashed a smile back. “Just, make sure you lock the door,” he told them. 

“Lock the door?” Stan asked.

“Yeah,” Dipper said. “Gravity Falls… is not a safe place.”

Stan looked uncomfortable. “Uh, sure. We’ll lock it.”

“Okay.” Dipper nodded and turned to walk away. 

“Goodnight, Dipper!” Mabel called after him. He paused and turned back. 

“Goodnight,” he said, and then disappeared down the hall. 


	2. The Last Gobblewonker

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mabel shrieked as a slimy head, and then a long, rubbery neck, shot out of the water. Dipper craned his head back, until he could just see the top of the creature, silhouetted against the sun.  
> “What is that?” Mabel breathed  
> //
> 
> Dipper and Mabel meet a friend and find a monster. Stan finds out more about his estranged brother.

“Do you people have any food in this house?” Stan asked, peering in dark cupboards. “Seriously, when was the last time you went shopping?” Dipper shrugged.   
“I dunno, a couple of months ago…?”

“A couple of months!” Stan shook his head. “Honestly, how are you even alive right now. No wonder the pair of you are so damn skinny.” He reached into one of the cupboards and pulled out a half-full bag of pasta. “What do you kids think about pasta, and uh…” He reached back in and pulled out a nearly-empty jar. “...Curry sauce, for breakfast?”

“Ew.” Mabel stuck her tongue out in disgust. “Isn’t there anything else?”   
“Doesn’t look like it,” Stan said. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door that echoed throughout the house. “Who could that be…?” Dipper turned his head to find Mabel looking at him; in unison, they shrugged. He slipped off his chair.

“I’ll get it,” he said, and made his way down the hall to the door. He fiddled with the locks and chains for a moment before pulling it open. 

“Hello, Dipper,” greeted the man on the other side. Dipper broke into a smile.

“Fiddleford!”

“It’s nice to see you, kid,” Fiddleford said. “And it’s nice to see that the place hasn’t burned down, too. Who’s car is that outside, by the way? Do you have guests?”

“Well-” Dipper started, but was cut off by Stan and Mabel appearing behind him. 

“Who’s this?” Stan asked, peering around Dipper. 

“Fiddleford McGucket,” Fiddleford said, frowning. “And, you are?”   
“Stanley Pines,” Stan introduced himself. Fiddleford blinked.

“Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit.”

* * *

Greasy’s Diner was the town’s best, and only, restaurant, which said a lot about the state of the town. Stan pulled a face as he flicked a piece of  _ something _ from the table onto the floor. On the seat opposite him sat Dipper and Mabel, and the stranger’s son- Tate, was it?- all of them tucking into the pile of pancakes set on the table.

“So, uh, McGucket, was it?” he asked the man sitting next to him. 

“Call me Fiddleford,” the man said. “You know, it was a mighty big surprise finding out that Stanford had reconciled with his brother.”

“I think ‘reconciled’ might be too generous of a word for it,” Stan replied. “‘Putting up with each other’ might be a little closer to our current relationship.”

“And yet you still sought him out,” Fiddleford said. Stan shrugged. 

“I wasn’t exactly long on options,” he said.

“Still, it’s probably a good thing that you’re here,” Fiddleford continued. “Ford can barely look after himself, let alone Dipper. When the kid was younger, I tried to be around more, but Ford… Well, we don’t exactly get along.” 

_ When he was younger…  _ “So, how long has Dipper been living with Ford, exactly?” Across the table, Dipper glanced up upon hearing his name, but was promptly distracted by Mabel and Tate once again. Fiddleford frowned.

“So he didn’t even tell ya that much,” he mumbled. “Well, about twelve years ago now, Ford called me up in the middle of the night, completely worked up, said he’d found a baby in the woods or somethin’... Long story short, Ford’s terrible at parenting, but the kid refuses to leave that shack. I think he’s worried about Ford or somethin’.”

“I see,” Stan sighed, glancing at the kids. 

Fiddleford gave him a  _ look _ . “Now I probably don’t have to tell ya this, but things are not quite right up in that old house. I can’t be there, so you’ll have to keep an eye on things for me. Make sure nothin’ happens. Can I trust ya, Stanley?”   
Stan paused, perturbed by that gaze. “I… Yeah. You can trust me.”

“Hey, Dad,” Tate called from across the table, causing both adults to glance over, “Can we go to the lake after this? I wanna show Dipper and Mabel something!”

“Sure, Tate,” Fiddleford said, flashing his son a warm smile. “Are you three finished?”

“Yeah!”   
“Yep!”   
“Yes.”

“Then let’s go!”

* * *

“This is my boat,” Tate said, gesturing towards the wooden rowing boat pulled up on the shore. “Isn’t she great?”

“She?” Mabel asked. “Boats have genders?”

“Sure do,” Tate told her. “They’re all lovely ladies. Like you!”   
Mabel giggled, cheeks reddening. “Pssh, stop it, you!” Tate grinned. In the background, Dipper sighed and rolled his eyes. The two of them ignored him. 

“So, do you wanna go out on the lake?” Tate asked, holding onto the side of the boat. “We could go out to that island if you like, it’s mighty beautiful this time of year.”

“Sure!” Mabel grinned and skipped over to the boat. “Dipper, are you coming?” Dipper shrugged.

“I guess,” he said. Mabel frowned.

“Come on, grumpy guts, cheer up! It’ll be fun!”   
“Sure,” Dipper agreed tonelessly as he got into the boat behind her.

“Alright, if you’re all in, let’s go!” Tate said, and pushed the boat from its place in the sand into the water. He hopped over the back and climbed over the seats to grab the oars and start rowing. 

“Can I help?” Mabel asked, gesturing towards the oars. Tate nodded.

“Sure thing! There’s an extra pair under the seats.” Mabel ducked down and spotted them, and grabbed them before sitting back up. “Now just turn around so your back’s to me, and row,” Tate told her. Mabel swivelled on her seat and placed the oars on the grooves, beginning to row. She smiled at Dipper, who she was now facing, and he offered her a tentative smile back.

“Isn’t this great?” she asked him, her voice almost drowned out by the splashing of the water. Her arms ached. 

“I guess,” Dipper replied. She frowned.

“What’s wrong? You’ve been acting kind of off all day.” She paused. “Or is this how you normally act? Was yesterday just an exception?” Dipper shrugged.

“I’m fine. I just…” He trailed off, glancing away.

“You just?” Mabel prompted.

“Have a bad feeling about this, is all.”    
Mabel considered that for a moment. “I’m sure it’s nothing. It’ll be fine, you’ll see.”

“I… Yeah, you’re probably right. Just me being paranoid, I guess.”

Mabel nodded, and they continued on in silence.

* * *

“So,” Stanley said to Fiddleford as they sat outside the shack at the edge of the lake. “How’d you meet my brother, anyway?”

“We met in college,” Fiddleford said. “Afterwards I was down in Palo Alto when he rang me, wanted my help on a project. At first, nothing seemed wrong, but as it went on… I don’t know. The project was dropped soon after Dipper arrived, and we eventually had a big fallin-out over… well, things. Nowadays I live just outta town, I try to drive up every coupla months to check on them. I worry, you know?” 

Stan frowned. “How bad  _ is _ Ford? Last I saw him, he was a little airheaded at times, but he didn’t seem quite so…”

“Dysfunctional?” Fiddleford suggested, raising an eyebrow. “To tell ya the truth, I don’t quite know. I try t’ avoid him when I pop by. All I can go off is the state of the house, and what Dipper says- which isn’t much. The kid’s not very talkative.”

Stan frowned, staring out across the sunlit lake. 

* * *

The boat pulled up on the shore, and Dipper followed Tate and Mabel as they hopped out of it and onto the sand. As they made their way through the island trees, Mabel was practically hanging onto Tate’s arm, listening raptly as he pointed out all the different types of plants and animals, laughing every time he said something remotely funny or flattering.

Dipper rolled his eyes.

“And here,” Tate said, as they came to a rocky edge of the island, “Is the critter I wanted to show you two!” He turned his head and beckoned Dipper. “C’mere, Dip, this thing seems right up your alley.”

Reluctantly, Dipper crept closer, peering around Tate’s other side and down at the water. Tate put his fingers to his mouth and whistled loudly. For a moment, nothing seemed to happen, but then Dipper noticed that the water was getting darker and darker as something under the water got closer and closer-

Mabel shrieked as a slimy head, and then a long, rubbery neck, shot out of the water. Dipper craned his head back, until he could just see the top of the creature, silhouetted against the sun. 

“What is that?” Mabel breathed, still gripping Tate’s arm, looking dazed and awed. 

“That thing’s called a gobblewonker,” Tate told them proudly. “I found her when she was a baby and I raised her! There used to be loads of gobblewonkers in Gravity Falls, but she’s the only one left.”    
“She’s beautiful,” Mabel said. “Does she have a name?”

“Her name is Sally!” Tate told her with a grin. He then turned his head to Dipper. “What do you think, man?”

“Well, it’s certainly… something,” he said, struggling to find the words. 

“Ain’t she? Say, do you kids wanna ride her?” 

Dipper paused. Mabel perked up. 

“Do I!” she gasped. Her eyes were practically shining with excitement. Dipper sighed.

“Sure,” he said reluctantly.

“Great!” Tate said. “Sally! C’mere Sally!” he called. The gobblewonker lowered her neck and rose slightly out of the water, and Tate jumped onto her back, holding a hand out to help Mabel daintily hop on. Once he was sure she was stable, he held out a hand for Dipper.

Dipper steeled himself and took it, allowing himself to be pulled up. Once he was on, Tate slapped Sally’s neck twice, and the massive monster began to move across the lake.

Dipper wobbled and fell down, catching himself on the gobblewonker’s slimy hide and moving into a sitting position. His stomach lurched uncomfortably at the motion of gliding across the lake. Tate and Mabel, however, seemed to have no problems with it, with Tate leaning on Sally’s neck, surveying the area, and Mabel leaning over the side, staring down with wide, amazed eyes, occasionally reaching down and letting her fingers trail through the silvery water, laughing as she did so.

Dipper sighed and fixed his gaze on the far shore, trying to calm his churning stomach. It didn’t really help, but it was enough for him to see Stan and Fiddleford stood on the shore, in varying states of shock. Tate seemed to have noticed them too, and directed Sally toward them. As they got to the shore, Dipper and Tate took the opportunity to hop off her back, heading toward the adults. 

“Tate, what is this?” Fiddleford asked as they approached.

“It’s a gobblewonker, Dad!” Tate said.

“I can see that, but… I thought they were all extinct?” Tate shook his head.

“Not this one!”

“Is that thing real?” Stan asked in bewilderment. Fiddleford shot him a sidelong glance.

“Of course it is. Didn’t anyone tell you? Gravity Falls is full of anomalies- the supernatural, if you will. It’s the reason your brother came out here.” He turned back to Tate. “How did you get it to trust you?”   
“I raised it,” Tate told him enthusiastically. “I found it a couple of years ago, and I couldn’t just leave it all alone, so I-”   
He was cut off by a sudden roar. There was a shriek as the gobblewonker lashed its neck forward, and, in one smooth motion, grabbed Stan in its mouth and pulled backwards. The three of them on the shore could only watch in silence as the monster retreated back underwater, a screaming Mabel clinging to her back and a struggling Stan clasped in its mouth.

“Well then,” Fiddleford said, twitching and adjusting his hat. Tate screamed,

“Sally!”

Dipper whispered, “Mabel.”

* * *

Mabel gasped as she surfaced from the water, drenched and dripping. She shivered, treading water for a moment as she got her bearings. She was in some sort of cave, with a pool of water below, a rock shelf all around it, and a curtain of water covering the entrance.

She swam to the edge of the water and pulled herself out of it, sitting on the edge and pulling off her soaked sweater. She left it there and got to her feet, looking around. “Hello?” she called. “Dad? Sally?”

At the sound of her voice, the gobblewonker rose from the water, her father still held in her teeth. Mabel’s eyes widened and filled with tears at the sight of his limp body, but she refused to let it faze her. He wasn’t dead. He  _ wasn’t _ . She just had to get them out of here, and everything would be fine.

“Why are you doing this?” she asked the monster, her voice echoing around the cavern. “What did he ever do to you?”   
The gobblewonker made a groaning noise and gestured with its head to the wall behind her. Mabel, confused, turned, and saw that what she had believed to be shadows and damp on the wall were actually pictures. Hesitantly, she stepped closer, peering at the dark illustrations, her fingers tracing over the rock as she studied them.

“Gobblewonkers,” she murmured alive. “A lot of them. And then this one.” She pointed at the wall. “It’s circled. Is that… you?” She turned to see Sally watching her, her eyes almost mournful. “And then,” Mabel said, turning back to the pictures, “And then… Someone comes. A human, right? Or something that looks like one. And it… oh no.” She swallowed, blinked back tears. “It killed them. But you escaped. And then Tate found you.” She turned around so that she was facing the monster once more. “But what does that have to do with him?”

Sally dropped Stan’s lifeless- no, not lifeless, unconscious- body on the stone and reached her neck over so that her head was level with Mabel’s. Mabel turned to see that the gobblewonker was pointing out one particular illustration.

“The killer… You think it was him?” Sally gave a grunt of affirmation and drew back. Mabel turned around. “It wasn’t him,” she told the monster. “I- I know it hurts. That person… They killed your family, right? But it can’t have been him, because he’s been with me. He’s my family. Please don’t take him away from me, like the person did to you.” 

Sally’s expression was blank, as if she didn’t understand what mabel was saying. She gestured to the wall again. Mabel found herself tearing up.

“It wasn’t him!” she screamed. “He’s my family, he’s my dad, let him go!” Sally recoiled. Mabel stood there, shaking, dripping water, tears streaming from her eyes. “Don’t kill my family like that person killed yours…”

Sally made a sound that sounded like a sigh. As Mabel watched, she lowered her head onto the stone, and gave Mabel a resigned look. Hesitantly, Mabel crept closer, and climbed onto her head; Sally grabbed Stan in her teeth, but gently this time, and then rose up. Mabel yelped as she slipped and grabbed onto the creature’s skin for support. Sally gave a disgruntled noise.

“Sorry!” Mabel apologised. With another disgruntled snort, Sally began to swim, and together, the three of them exited the cave.

* * *

“Mabel!” Dipper called.

“Sally!” cried Tate beside him.

“Stanley!” Fiddleford completed the call.

The three of them were stood on the lakeshore, unable to do anything but yell. Dipper sighed in frustration, but his stomach was crawling with nerves. He glared down at the water miserably. 

As he watched, the water began to ripple and grow darker. His eyes widened and he jumped back. The movement caused Fiddleford and Tate to look over in concern, before they were knocked back by the force of Sally rocketing up out of the water and laying her head on the sand. Dipper stared down as Mabel hopped off the monster’s head and Stan rolled out of her mouth with a groan.

“Mabel!” he gasped. Mabel pulled her sopping hair out of her face and tried to smile at him. Her face crumpled up and she began to cry.

“D-Dipper,” she greeted, and then, before he could do anything, she leapt at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and burying her face in his shoulder. Dipper stared awkwardly as Fiddleford and Tate watched them. Tate mimed wrapping his arms around himself, and hesitantly, Dipper wrapped his arms around Mabel’s back.

“Uh, it’s okay,” he soothed quietly, awkwardly, and Mabel hugged him tighter.

“Yeah, it’s okay,” she whispered in his ear, “I’m okay. I just need a moment.”

Dipper nodded and just held her as Tate and Fiddleford crowded over Stan to check if he was okay. Dipper watched as Sally blinked slowly, almost apologetically at him, and then disappeared underwater once more. The sun beat down on the lake.

For a moment, everything was still.

* * *

“I am really sorry about that,” Fiddleford apologised to Stan as they arrived back at the shack. Stan shrugged.

“Eh, don’t worry about it. Just keep your, uh, lake monster under control next time.”   
Fiddleford smiled. “I think we can do that.” He glanced at his son and nudged him. “Right, Tate?”   
“Right!” Tate agreed, nodding. “I really don’t know what came over her today, Mr Pines, she’s not normally like that.”

“Yeah, well… Good,” Stan said, nodding. Behind them, Dipper and Mabel got out of the car, Dipper having leant Mabel his jacket since she’d lost her sweater somewhere in the chaos. They came up beside Stan and the McGuckets, looking up at the old house in the woods.

“Well, this is where we leave ya,” Fiddleford said. “I hope that, besides the monster trying to kidnap y’all, this was a pleasurable enough experience?”   
Mabel nodded. “I had fun,” she said with a smile. Fiddleford smiled back.

“I’m mighty pleased to hear that, little lady. Dipper,” he added, “I’ll see ya soon, okay? Look after Ford for me.” Dipper nodded.

“Alright.”

“Well, see you guys next time!” Tate said to the kids. “Will you still be here, Mabel?” he added as an afterthought. Mabel smiled.

“I hope so,” she said.

“Yeah, me too,” Tate agreed. 

Dipper pulled a face.

Stan laughed. He held out a hand to Fiddleford took it.

“Remember what you promised,” he reminded Stan.   
“I remember,” Stan said. “You can count on me.”

The two of them exchanged nods and then turned to go their separate ways. The kids joined Stan as the three of them made their way up to the front door, the sound of Fiddleford’s car driving away fading behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can I first of all just say thank you to everyone reading this? The amount of response I got for the first chapter was overwhelming, I don't think I've ever had a fic so positively received within the first few days of posting! I love reading (and replying to) all of your comments, and every kudos keeps me going. I'm even more excited for this fic now that I know other people are as well!
> 
> This chapter really did not want to be written. On a good day, I can sit down and have a chapter done in a couple of hours, but this one took me about three days and was very painful to write. I think part of it was to do with McGucket's role in this chapter; I find it really hard to write dialogue for him for some reason, probably because he's from the south and I'm from a whole other continent. At one point I had to ask my friend for help writing him, so... yeah. I'm glad this one's over.
> 
> Tate here is a couple of years older than both of the kids, having been born around the same time as he was in canon. As the portal incident never happened in this universe, Fiddleford's relationship with his wife and son is still intact, though his relationship with Ford is not. We also get more allusions to Ford's history and where Dipper came from (though I'm not planning to reveal that for a while yet...). And Mabel is still the same old Mabel, a hopeless romantic and complete badass capable of shouting down a monster that wants to eat her family. Also, for those of you who wanted it, Dipper gets another hug (though he wasn't the one that needed it, this time...).
> 
> Next chapter we'll meet the teens of Gravity Falls, and also get more interaction between the Stans. See you then!


	3. The Murder House

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Come on, Wendy,” Lee urged. “What’s the worst that could happen? Even Robbie’s in, right Robbie?”  
> “Eh, why not?” Robbie agreed. Wendy glanced between them all and sighed, then broke out in a grin.  
> “Sure. Let’s go to the murder house!”  
> //
> 
> Dipper and Mabel do their best to defend their house from intruders whilst Stan and Ford are away on a mission.

“This is stupid,” Robbie said as the teens sat around the Ouija board.

“Aw, come on, don’t you wanna talk to any ghosts?” Wendy teased. Robbie huffed.

“Ghosts don’t exist,” he muttered, but didn’t protest anymore. The six of them sat with their hands resting on the counter for a moment before, slowly, it began to move.

“Whoa!” Wendy gasped.

“No way!” Nate echoed.

“What’s it saying?” Wendy asked, watching the letters as they were spelled out. “Y-O-U-R-A-L-L- You’re all- I-D-I-O- hey! Who’s doing this?” Lee burst out laughing. “Dude, not funny!” Wendy said, but laughed too, jokingly slapping him on the arm.

“This is a stupid idea,” Lee said with a shrug, still grinning. “Why would there be ghosts in Thomson’s attic, of all places?” In the background, Thomson mumbled something that no one listened to. “But you know where there probably are ghosts?”  
“Where?”   
“That old murder house, up in the woods.”

The group paused. “You wanna go up there?” Nate asked. Lee shrugged.

“Why not? It could be fun,” he said. “Even if it’s not haunted, abandoned buildings are neat.”

“How do you know its abandoned?” Wendy asked. “I swear someone lives up there.”

The others shrugged. “I’ve never seen anybody up there.”  
“Yeah, me neither.”   
“Come on, Wendy,” Lee urged. “What’s the worst that could happen? Even Robbie’s in, right Robbie?”   
“Eh, why not?” Robbie agreed. Wendy glanced between them all and sighed, then broke out in a grin.

“Sure. Let’s go to the murder house!”

* * *

Ford startled as a hand clasped his shoulder. He jumped, turning to see his brother watching him with concern. He sighed. “Stanley. What do you want?”

“I wanted to know where you’re going,” Stan said.

“I have some errands to run,” Ford told him snappily, and pulled his shoulder out from under Stan’s hand, returning to packing his bag.

“Right,” Stan drawled, folding his arms. “Errands. At this time of night? And what do you need all those weapons for, anyway?” Ford glared at him, shutting his bag with a huff.

“It’s really none of your business what I do on missions-”  
“Tonight?” broke in a third voice, and the two of them turned to see Dipper stood in the doorway. In the dim light he looked pale and tired, and his expression was one of disappointment.

“Dipper,” Ford greeted hastily. “It’s fine, I shouldn’t be long. I’ll see you in the morning.”  
Dipper sighed, then nodded. “Okay.”

Stan glanced between Ford and Dipper, then back again. “Alright, I’m coming with you,” he declared. Ford frowned.

“What? No you’re not. It’s too dangerous.” Stan barked a laugh.

“Ha! Dangerous! I can handle myself, Poindexter.” Ford wasn’t buying it. “And if it’s really so dangerous, than you shouldn’t be going by yourself.”  
“I can handle-” Ford broke off, realising that he’d gotten himself caught, and sighed. “Fine. Come if you really want. I won’t be held responsible for anything that happens to you.”

“Nothing’s gonna happen to me,” Stan declared heartily. Then, “Hey, kid, say goodnight to Mabel for me! See ya in the morning.”

“Okay,” Dipper said again.

“Dipper, remember, I need you to lock the doors behind us. And don’t let anybody in, unless-”  
“Yeah, I know,” Dipper said, and offered a hesitant smile. “Go. We’ll be fine here.”

“Alright,” Ford said. “Goodnight, Dipper.”  
“Good luck, Ford.”   
Ford waved and opened the door, marching out into the night. Behind him, Stan scrambled to catch up. “So,” he said, panting slightly, “Where’re we going?”

“The one place you should never go, especially at night,” Ford told him. “We’re going into the woods.”

* * *

“Dipper?” Mabel called as she made her way through the house. “Dipper, where are you?” As she rounded the corner she nearly walked straight into him, and the two of them came to a stop.

“Hey, Mabel,” Dipper greeted. “Did you want something?”

“I was just, wondering where my Dad is, was all.”

“Oh, he and Ford went out,” he said. Mabel frowned.

“At night?” she asked.

“They’ll be fine,” Dipper told her. “And we’ll be fine too, as long as we keep all the doors locked shut.”

“...That’s not very comforting,” Mabel said, but her voice was drowned out by the sound of a car pulling up outside the house. The two of them froze. “Maybe Dad and Uncle Ford are back?” Mabel asked hopefully, her heart hammering. Dipper shook his head.

“No, they walked.”

“Oh,” Mabel mumbled. Then, “Is there anyway we can see who’s here?” Dipper paused, then nodded, and lead her into the front room- or, at least, she thought it was the front room? It was the one that stuck out the side of the house, with all the weapons hanging on the walls and books piled everywhere. When they were there, Dipper made his way to one of the walls and pulled back a curtain she’d thought covered yet another window to reveal a ladder, and a trapdoor leading upwards.

“Whoa,” Mabel breathed as Dipper began to climb it. As he opened the trapdoor, letting a cool breeze rush through the room, he turned to her.

“Are you coming?” he asked. Mabel nodded, and grabbed the sides of the ladder, starting to climb behind him.

Eventually she got to the top and pulled herself through the door and up onto the roof. Dipper was crouching there, peering over the roof at where the new car was parked, right beside Stan’s. It was more of a minivan than a car, she realised now, and as they watched, a group of people climbed out of it. Beside her, Dipper sighed.

“Teenagers,” he said dully. Mabel glanced at him.

“What?” she asked. Dipper glanced at her, a look of realisation on his face.

“Oh, right. Well, since we don’t exactly go into town often, there are… A lot of rumours about this place. Every couple of years some teenagers will come up on a dare to check the place out, but they usually leave. It should be fine.”

“And what if they don’t leave?” Mabel asked, watching as the teens made their way to the front door and began to kick at it.

“They can’t get in,” Dipper told her confidently. A moment later, there was a loud crash, and whoops of excitement as the teens broke the door in. Dipper froze. Mabel gave him an expectant look.

“So, what now?” she asked.

“I- I don’t know!” Dipper said. “This has never happened before, I don’t know what to do…” An idea had been slowly forming in Mabel’s mind, and now, finally, it came together. She grinned. Dipper noticed her expression. “What? What are you thinking?”

“They came here because they thought it was haunted, right?”  Mabel asked, still upholding that creepy grin.

“Yeah…”

“Then let’s make them think it is. Let’s scare them out of here.”

Dipper frowned. “And how exactly are we going to do that?”   
“Just leave it to Mabel.”

* * *

Wendy shone the flashlight around the room, highlighting bare wooden walls and peeling wallpaper. Behind her, the others all craned their necks, looking around the room. Everything smelled musty and old. There was damp crawling its way across the ceiling.

“Ew,” Tambry muttered.

“It certainly looks abandoned,” Nate said, taking another step forward and then jumping back as a spider crawled over his foot, crashing into Lee as he did so.

“Hey, get off of me!” Lee laughed, pushing him forward. “You big baby.”

“Come on, then,” Wendy said as she made her way down the hall. “You guys wanted to take a look around, right?” She spun around so that she was walking backwards, illuminating her friends for a moment as they followed her down the hall, before returning to looking where she was going. The flashlight revealed an open door, and she made her way over to it, shining the beam into the room.

“Umm, guys…?” she called. In a moment, her friends had crowded behind her, looking at what the flashlight had illuminated. In one of the walls were studded a series of knives, all of them with a suspiciously blood-like substance dripping down from their blades.

Thomson swallowed. “It says beware,” he whimpered. Robbie scoffed.

“No it doesn’t, it says ‘bewarb’. Look.” He grabbed the flashlight off Wendy and traced the letters with the beam. “See?”  
“Oh, yeah,” Wendy said. “I guess this ghost is really bad at spelling, huh?” She laughed, and the others joined in, though she couldn’t help but notice that they seemed a little uneasy.

* * *

 

“What exactly are we looking for?” Stan asked, shaking his leg free of some vines that had entrapped his ankle. Ford glanced back at him over his shoulder, still holding some weird sci-fi looking gun in his hands.

“A monster,” he explained briefly. Stan rolled his eyes.

“Oh yes. So specific. I now know what I’m doing.” Ford sighed.

“It’s a shapeshifter,” he elaborated. “It can take any shape and form. That’s why I gave you that password.”

“Right,” Stan drawled. “So, why are we looking for this thing?”

“It escaped from the lab,” Ford said. “I need to terminate it before it causes any problems.”

“Wait, wait, you had this highly dangerous creature in your _house_ ?”   
“That’s what I just said, Stanley.” Ford rolled his eyes. Suddenly, he froze. “Do you hear that?”

“Hear what? I don’t hear-” Stan cut himself off as he heard the deep roar that echoed through the trees, and felt the ground shake beneath him. “Okay, I heard _that_.”

“It’s coming toward us,” Ford warned him, taking a step back.

“Should we run?” Stan asked as the ground began to shake more violently.

“I feel that would be wise.”  
The two of them turned and fled from the beast bearing down on them.

* * *

“I knew we should have moved those knives,” Dipper lamented as the two of them stared through gaps in the wall.

“It’s fine,” Mabel said with a wave of her hand. “I, for one, can’t believe that this house is full of secret passageways!” Dipper gave her a look.

“It’s a creepy old house out in the woods, what did you expect?” Mabel shrugged.

“So what do we do now? The knives and the jam wasn’t enough…”

“I don’t know,” Dipper said with a shrug. “This was your idea, remember?”

“So it was… Oh! How about we show them a ghost?” Dipper gave her an alarmed look.

“Where do you want to get a ghost from?! They’re not the most friendly of things-”

“Not a real one, dummy!” Mabel laughed. “Come on, follow me. I have an idea.”

* * *

It was dark as they entered the attic space, the only light coming from the beam of the dying Flashlight and the single, triangular window. The flashlight flickered, once, twice, and then died, and Robbie cursed, hitting it to try and make it work to no avail.

Wendy glanced around, waiting for her eyes to adjust, and noticed something. There, stood in front of the window, illuminated by the weak moonlight filtering through it, was a boy that hadn’t be there before.

“Guys,” she whispered, “Look.”

The others stopped their fussing and turned to stare at the boy as well. He was deathly pale, with dark eyes and hair and dark smudges under his eyes that looked like bruises. He was thin and gaunt with the physique of a skeleton, bony hands twitching at his sides. He wore a white shirt and dark trousers, which were both too big for him and covered in blood.

“It’s a ghost,” Lee whispered, and this time, no one argued with him. Almost as one, Wendy’s friends turned tail and fled, yelling,

“Let’s get out of here!”

Wendy startled, having been so transfixed she hadn’t noticed them preparing to leave. She spun around and yelled, “Hey, wait!” but before she could follow them out of the door it slammed shut behind her, trapping her in. From the ceiling echoed a dark, foreboding laugh, and Wendy shivered.

She spun around, steadied her shoulders, and readied her stance, glaring at the flickering ghost before her. “I’m not afraid of you!” she yelled, lying through her teeth. “You hear me? I’m not afraid of you!”

The ghost vanished for good, as did the eerie laughter and mysterious banging noises. In its place, whispering started off, quiet voices that she couldn’t quite decipher. Wendy glanced around the room, eyes wide. “Hello?”

After a moment, it fell silent, and seconds after, a plank on the wall gave way and two kids stepped out; a girl with long, curly hair, and the ghost from earlier. Except, he didn’t look quite so ghostly now. He was still deathly pale and gaunt, but he was much more solid, and his blank expression wasn’t quite as much unsettling as it was resigned.

“Hi,” the girl said as the plank slid back into place. “I’m Mabel.”  
Wendy could do nothing but stare for a moment, speechless. Finally, she said, “Hi, I’m Wendy.”   
“It’s nice to meet you, Wendy!” Mabel said with a smile. “We’re sorry about that, by the way. Right, Dipper?” She nudged the boy beside her, who sighed.

“Right.”  
“We tried to scare you because we thought it’d make you go away,” Mabel carried on. “And it worked on your friends, but not on you. So we thought we should come, I don’t know, explain ourselves. Congratulate you on your bravery.”   
“Oh.” Wendy blinked, looking between them. “Well… thank you.” She laughed. “You know, I never did think this place was haunted, or even abandoned.”

“Promise you won’t come back?” Mabel asked. “We’re not supposed to let strangers into the house, we didn’t really know what else to do.” Wendy laughed.

“Well, that was amazing. How did you get him to do that flickery ghost thing?” she asked, pointing to Dipper.

“A trick with the lights and a mirror,” Dipper said with a shrug. Wendy grinned.

“Well, it was great. I’m pretty sure Thomson pis- wet himself!”

“It was pretty funny,” Mabel agreed with a smile. “We can show you the way out, if you like?”  
“Sure,” Wendy agreed, and followed the kids downstairs. As they passed the room with the knives and all the other weapons, she paused, and a grin spread across her face. “Say,” she called to the twins, “What do you feel about messing with those guys one last time?” The kids glanced at each other, seemingly conversing with their eyes, before turning back to her. Mabel was grinning, her eyes bright with excitement.

“What do you have in mind?”

* * *

“Where is she?” Robbie asked as the five of them stood outside of the minivan, staring up at the murder house.

“Maybe the ghost got her,” Thomson mumbled. Robbie scoffed.

“Come on, there’s no such thing as ghosts.” The others have him bewildered looks.

“If there’s no such thing as ghosts,” Nate said, “Then what was that?” Robbie waved his arms.  
“I don’t know! A trick of the light?”

“You keep telling yourself that, man,” Lee said, shuddering.

Suddenly, the door to the old house creaked open, and the group froze, slowly lowering their gaze to look at the figure exiting the house.

“It’s Wendy!” Lee cried in relief.  
“Is it though?” Nate asked, peering through the darkness. “Guys, I think there’s something wrong…”   
Beside Wendy, two more figures came into view, and together the three of them lumbered down the stairs outside of the house and made their way toward the teens. Robbie recognised one of them as the ‘ghost’ they’d seen earlier, though the other one- a girl with long, wild hair- was unfamiliar. All three of them had blank expressions, were holding weapons, and, most notably, were covered in blood.

Thomson screamed. Lee yelled, “They got Wendy! Let’s go!”

Robbie was about to protest, but upon getting a closer look at Wendy’s pallid face, blood trickling down from her hairline, he changed his mind, and went to jump into the van behind his friends, only to pause.

“What the…?” he breathed as two grown men came racing out of the woods, chased by a large, lumbering bear-like creature with limbs from too many different animals to name.

“Kids!” one of the men yelled, and behind Robbie, the figures startled, expression returning to their faces.

“What are you doing out here?” yelled the other man. He caught sight of Robbie and added, “And who the hell is this?”

“What is that thing?” Wendy yelled as the men skidded past her and came to a halt.

“That thing is highly dangerous, and-” the second man started, but didn’t finish, cut off as Wendy went racing toward the monster, raising the axe she was holding above her head.

“Wendy, what are you doing?” Robbie yelled after her, but was ignored as Wendy leaped into the air and brought the axe down, hard, on the creature. It gave a terrifying, inhuman scream, a sound Robbie was sure would haunt his nightmares for _years_ , and began to change, becoming something that looked a lot like a centipede made out of clear jelly. From the incision in its body it began to bleed green, and writhed in pain as Wendy cut it clear in two. The halves of the creature fell down on the ground and began to disintegrate, Wendy standing up proud and tall in the wreckage, covered in green slime, her hair blowing in the wind.

“Whoa,” Robbie breathed.

“Wendy, that was amazing!” the unfamiliar girl cried, her eyes bright with excitement. The two men looked between the minivan of terrified teens, the kids, and the girl who had just defeated _whatever_ that monster was.

“What’s going on here?” asked the second man in absolute bewilderment.

* * *

Wendy huddled under the blanket they’d given her, dressed in the clothes the owner of the house- Stanford, his name was- had leant her. They were too big, but she found she didn’t mind much as she sat cross-legged, holding a cup of hot chocolate in her hands. Opposite her, Dipper and Mabel were explaining to their older family members what had happened that night as her friends, sitting on both sides of her, listened in. Wendy couldn’t tell if their stance surrounding her was protective or terrified, but she appreciated it all the same.

“Well,” Stanford said, as the kids finished their story, “I guess there are some thanks in order here. Wendy? Thank you for saving us this evening.” Wendy beamed, then tried to tone it down and appear calm, despite the fact that she was buzzing inside.

“It’s no problem,” she told him. “Really, it was the least I could do, after breaking into your house and all. Uh, sorry about that, by the way.” Stanford nodded.

“Yes, well, you are welcome to come back, but make sure you knock next time, alright?” Wendy laughed.

“Alright, Mr. Pines.”

“I don’t know about you guys but I don’t plan on coming back here,” Lee said. “No offense or anything, but this place is creepy.”

“Me too.”  
“Yeah, no thanks.”   
“Pssh, you wimps,” Wendy scoffed. “You got scared by a couple of kids!” She flashed a smile at Dipper and Mabel. “You guys are the coolest, okay? Tonight was so much fun. I’m gonna remember this forever.”   
“Will you be coming back?” Dipper asked curiously, and Mabel nodded enthusiastically.   
“Yeah, we should hang out sometime!”

Wendy smiled. “I don’t see why not.”

* * *

Out in the woods, hidden beneath the long grass at the bottom of the tree, sat a single blue-tinted egg. With nobody there to witness it, it made an unheard, indescribable noise, and a single, hairline crack appeared on the surface.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was so fun to write, simply because it has some of the best first impressions I've ever written. If you haven't noticed by now, I'm following the show's actual episode plan, and writing a variation of each episode as a chapter. So why, then, would I chose to write this in place of "Headhunters"? Well, there are two reasons for that. The first is that I couldn't come up with a plot similar enough to Headhunters, because all of the things that made that episode possible didn't happen in this universe. I did, however, have two ideas for "The Inconveniencing", so this was a chance to write both of them, by having the first idea happen earlier and editing the second one to make more sense in this revised timeline. The shapeshifter, however, was partly inspired by "Headhunters" though I didn't, in the end, have it take the shape of any of the Stans. I wish I could have focused more on them in this chapter, but there was already so much going on in the kids/Wendy's PoVs that I had to cut it. Oh well, there are plenty of other opportunities for twin bonding, and rest assured, it will come!
> 
> Please tell me what you thought of this chapter! Next chapter, the Pines will encounter Gideon, so look forward to that! Also, if you guys wanna chat you can hmu on tumblr @galaxyford! I'm happy to talk about this fic, or the show in general, or anything really!


	4. The Not-So-Gleeful Gideon Gleeful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “So come down soon, folks… Gideon is expecting you.”  
> //
> 
> Mabel makes a new friend, and Stan discusses a business deal. Meanwhile, Ford and Dipper enjoy a quiet day out.

“I just can’t believe you didn’t have a T.V., Sixer,” Stan said as he hauled the television through the (now) T.V. room door. “What do you do all day?” Ford sniffed, watching him with arms crossed, the kids stood on either side of him in varying degrees of excitement and curiosity.

“There’s no need for one,” Ford said. “Some of us have work to be doing, Stanley. And  _ don’t _ call me that.” Stan shot him a look but then turned his head back as he placed the television down on the floor with a soft  _ thud _ . 

“You need to take a break, bro,” he said, dusting off his hands. “Have a day off. Relax a little. Get out of the house for once.”

“I leave the house,” Ford protested. 

“Yeah, to go into the woods! Jesus, Poindexter, when was the last time you went into town? Spoke to someone outside of your own family?” Ford paused.

“Uhh…”   
“Exactly,” Stan said, taking a step away from the T.V. as Mabel crouched before it, playing with the buttons on the front, Dipper looking over her shoulder in curiousity. “Come on, Ford, one day off isn’t going to kill you. It might even do you some good.” Ford rolled his eyes.

“And what would you suggest we do? If you hadn’t noticed, Gravity Falls is a bit of a dead town.” Before them, the T.V. blared to life, distracting them from their argument as a fuzzy advert began to play, the tinny sound of a southern accent echoing around the room.

_ “Are you completely miserable?”  _

_ “Yes!”  _

_ “Then you need to meet  _ Gideon _. He’s a psychic. So don’t waste your time with other so-called mysteries! Learn about tomorrow tonight at Gideon’s Tent of Telepathy. Voidwhereprohibited,noC.O.D.'saccepted.CarlaI'vealwayslovedyoubutneverhadthegutstosayit.” _

“How about that?” Stan suggested, pointing at the television. Ford rolled his eyes.

“Don’t be ridiculous, Stan, it’s a scam. I thought you were smarter than to fall for those.”   
“I know that, Poindexter, I’m just saying, hey, you might have fun. We could all do with getting out of this house.”   
“Please, Uncle Ford?” Mabel asked, turning around from the T.V. to give her best puppy-dog eyes. “It’d be nice to see some more of the town! Especially as a family!”

Ford sighed. “Dipper, please tell me you’re not on board with this too.” Dipper shrugged.

“It might be fun,” he said flatly. Ford sighed again.   
“Fine. We’ll go. But I won’t like it.”

_ “So come down soon, folks… Gideon is expecting you.” _

* * *

There was a crowd outside the Tent of Telepathy, making their way inside, buzzing with excitement. Mabel took a deep breath in, smiling and swinging her arms.

“It looks like the whole town’s out here!” she said, beaming. “Isn’t this exciting?”   
“Yeah, yeah,” Ford muttered, glancing around. A large man with a broom and cap bumped into him and hurriedly apologised, moving on, but the brief interaction only caused Ford to frown deeper. Mabel pouted.

“Come on, let’s go inside,” she urged.  _ I’m going to get Uncle Ford to have fun no matter what! _

Together they made their way towards the tent entrance, where a large southern man was yelling, “Step right up, folks! Put your money in Gideon’s psychic sack!”

“You’re the man from the commercial!” Mabel cried as they approached him. The man smiled at her widely.

“So I am, little lady! The name’s Bud Gleeful, pleased to make your acquaintance.” Mabel giggled as he tipped his hat to her. “I hope you enjoy the show,” Bud added as Stan begrudgingly dropped their admission fees into the sack and pulled her along. Mabel grinned and waved back before the curtain of the tent fell shut behind them. She spun around, Stan letting her go, and looked around the tent at the stage and the rows of seats set up before it.

“Can we sit at the front?” Mabel asked, hopping with excitement. 

“No,” Ford said flatly, and sat himself in the back row. Mabel frowned but followed him anyway, plopping herself on the bench at the side. Dipper hopped up beside her, and Stan sat beside him, as the lights darkened and the stage curtains began to open.

“It’s starting!” she gasped in excitement, and watched, enthralled, as the small, white-haired boy appeared onstage.

“Hello America! My name is lil’ Gideon,” he said, clapping his hands. Doves flew out of his hair and Mabel gasped in excitement. “Ladies and gentlemen, it is such a  _ gift _ to have you here tonight! ...Such a gift. I have a  _ vision _ . I predict that you will soon all say, ‘aww’.” He struck a cute pose, and from the audience came a large,

“Aww!”

Mabel shook Dipper’s arm. “It came true!” she enthused. Dipper gave her a concerned look and pulled away, scooting along the bench away from her. Mabel pouted and turned to Ford, only to hesitate at his stony expression. She turned back to the show, pouting, her head in her hands. 

Onstage, Gideon was singing. “ _ Oh, I can see, what other’s can’t see. It ain’t some sideshow trick, it’s innate ability! Where others are blind, I am futurely inclined, and you too could see- if you was widdle ol’ me! Come on, everybody, rise up! Keep it going!” _

Mabel found herself on her feet, clapping, along with everybody else- even Ford, who looked absolutely bewildered.

“What? How on earth-” he started, but was cut off as Gideon resumed his singing.

“Keep it going!” He pointed to one of the women in the audience. “ _ You wish your son would call you more!”  _ Next to a man sitting in the audience, covered head-to-toe in Lil’ Gideon memorabilia. 

“Oh, come on,” Ford muttered in disbelief. “How are these people falling for this?”

Gideon had hopped down from the stage and was now standing by their row, and grinned at Mabel. Mabel winced momentarily as a spotlight was shone on her. “ _ I’ll read your mind if I am able, _ ” the child psychic sang, “ _ Something tells me your name’s Mabel!” _

Mabel gasped, watching him starry-eyed as he walked away. “How did he know?” she whispered in excitement. Dipper, beside her, gave her an amused look and pointed down. 

“Uhh, Mabel?” Mabel followed his finger to her sweater, on which she’d stitched her name. She chuckled awkwardly.

“Oh. Yeah.” Mabel glanced back up in time to see Gideon return to the stage to finish his song.

“ _ So welcome all of ye… to the Tent of Telepathy!  _ And thanks for visiting widdle ol’ me!” The crowd erupted in applause, and Mabel found herself doing the same, grinning widely. Onstage, Gideon took a drink of water as the crowd began to murmur and move away. “Thank you! You people are the real miracles!” 

“That was amazing!” Mabel enthused to her family as they made their way out of the tent. “Don’t you guys think so?” The others wouldn’t meet her eyes, all showing varying degrees of awkwardness. Mabel groaned. “Nobody else liked that?”

“It was kinda stupid,” Dipper said apologetically, shrugging.

“A waste of time,” Ford agreed. Mabel glanced hopefully at her dad, but he simply shrugged.

“It was a bit of a scam, sweetie,” he said. “I mean, that guys making money for practically nothing!” He stopped, suddenly, a look of realisation coming across his face. “Actually… that’s a brilliant idea!” Ford paused too, looking concerned.

“Stanley, whatever you’re thinking, no.”

Mabel knew that her father couldn’t hear a word he was saying.

* * *

Dipper stood by Ford and Mabel as the three of them watched Stan go up to Bud Gleeful and start chatting to him, too far away for them to hear what the two of them were saying. Eventually, Bud seemed to invite Stan inside, and the two of them disappeared into the tent, just as Gideon came out. The psychic stretched, yawned, and then looked around, his eyes happening upon the three of them. A grin spread across his face.

Beside Dipper, Mabel was buzzing as Gideon made his way over to them. “Why, hello there,” he greeted. “I trust y’all enjoyed today’s show?”

“Yes!” Mabel enthused. “It was  _ amazing _ !” Gideon chuckled.

“Well, aren’t you just the sweetest peach?” Mabel beamed. “You know, when I saw you in the audience, I thought to myself, ‘Now there’s a kindred spirit! Someone who appreciates the sparkly things in life’.” 

“That’s totally me!” Mabel nodded. 

“So enchanting,” Gideon breathed, and then shook himself. “Your laugh, I mean. Say, would you like to chat a bit more? Go on a walk, maybe stop by my dressing room?”

“Oh, makeovers!” Mabel gasped. “You’re on!” She poked Gideon in the stomach in excitement.

“Ow.”

“Oh, did I hurt you?”   
“Oh, don’t you worry, doll, I’m just fine. Now, if you’ll join me…” He held his arm out for Mabel to take, and the two of them wandered off, chatting excitedly. 

“Should we let her go?” Dipper asked concernedly. Ford shrugged.

“Stanley’s still around, I’m sure he’ll keep an eye out for her. And the kid may be a fraud, but he doesn’t look particularly dangerous.”    
“I guess,” Dipper agreed. “I wonder what’s with his hair?” he added, wondering aloud. “Do you think he keeps something in there?”   
“Like what?” Ford asked, giving him a confused look. Dipper shrugged.

“I don’t know, a deformed second twin?” Ford looked disturbed.

“Maybe it is a good thing that we’re spending some time away,” he said, laughing nervously. He glanced around. “So, what now? Do you want to head home, or is there something else you’d like to do?” Dipper looked around.

“I don’t know. What is there to do?” He glanced back at the tent. “And we can’t go home without them, can we?” 

“I suppose you are right,” Ford agreed. “How about we go get some lunch?” Hesitantly, Dipper smiled, and nodded.

“Sure. I’d like that.”   
Together, the two of them made their way back into town.

* * *

“This is amazing!” Mabel told Gideon as the two of them sat on the roof of his family’s factory, having both gotten makeovers at the tent beforehand. When they’d left, their fathers had been intently discussing something, and had simply said to have fun. “The view from here is nuts. Luckily we both brought our-”

“-Opera glasses!” Mabel giggled as the two of them pulled the glasses out of their pockets. 

“Hey, Mabel?” Gideon said as Mabel was looking out over the town. 

“Hmm?” 

“I’ve never felt so… connected to anyone before. It’s almost like we were destined to meet.”   
Mabel laughed. “You think?” she asked, turning to look at him. He nodded.

“I really do. How do you feel about the concept of soulmates?”

“Huh?” Mabel blinked. “Well, I think people have soulmates… Or at least, I hope I do.” 

“I think I may have met mine today,” he told her. Feeling slightly uncomfortable now, Mabel asked, 

“Yeah?”   
“Yeah. And she’s sitting right next to me.” Mabel giggled awkwardly.

“Aww, you’re too sweet, Gideon.”

“Don’t you feel the same?” Gideon asked. Mabel hesitated.

“Uhh…”   
“Mabel? My darlin’?”

“Gideon, I… Don’t take this the wrong way, but I’d really rather just be friends.”   
“Like boyfriend-girlfriend-friends?”   
“Like friend-friends. I’m sorry, Gideon, but there’s too much going on right now for me to try and date someone, what with reconnecting with estranged family, and the threat of gnome revenge hanging over my head…”

“But Mabel, my cherry pie, don’t you feel we’re made for each other?” Gideon asked. Mabel bit her lip, and looked down. Gideon’s face turned stormy. “Oh. I see now.”   
Mabel glanced up hopefully. “You see that this has nothing to do with you and it’d be better if we could just stay friends?”

“What? No, I see that it’s your family that’s in my way. So all I have to do is get rid of them, and…”   
“Get rid of them?” Mabel asked, eyes wide, feeling a sense of dread overcome her. “You aren’t gonna kill them, are you?” Gideon’s intensity seemingly snapped, and he laughed.

“What? No. Don’t you worry, my sugarplum.”

“Ha, okay…” Mabel said. She tried to return to town-gazing, but found she felt too uncomfortable to continue. “Gideon?” she sighed. “Listen, I think I’m just gonna… go. It’s been fun, okay?”

“Okay,” Gideon responded, but he didn’t look at her. Mabel bit her lip, feeling awful, as she turned to make her way back down the building. “Watch your step,” Gideon warned her, and Mabel nodded.

“Okay,” she whispered, and, not knowing if he’d heard her or not, disappeared down the stairs.

* * *

Mabel slipped into the Tent of Telepathy and wandered over to where her dad and Bud Gleeful were sat, still deep in conversation. She stood there for a moment, listening to their plans for a joint-effort show, featuring Mabel as well, and suddenly felt even guiltier. Hesitantly, she tugged on the sleeve of Stan’s shirt.

“Dad?” she said quietly. Stan turned to her and instantly frowned.

“Mabel? What’s wrong sweetie?” Mabel shook her head. 

“I don’t wanna talk about it. Can we just go home?” 

Stan nodded, and reached up to stroke her hair. “Not feeling well?” he asked sympathetically. He turned back to Bud and gave him an apologetic look. “Sorry, Bud. We’ll have to continue this another time.” Bud nodded.

“Of course. I hope you feel better soon, little lady,” he added, smiling at Mabel. Mabel gave a faint, watery smile back, and nodded. Still holding onto Stan’s arm, she pressed into his side as the two of them made their way out of the tent.

“Now,” Stan said, ruffling her hair, “Let’s find that brother of mine and the kid, and we’ll get home, okay sweetheart?” Mabel nodded, sniffing hard to hold her tears in. The two of them paused for a moment, looking around the empty area outside of the tent. “Where’d they go?”   


* * *

Dipper laughed quietly, taking another sip from his milkshake. He and Ford were sat on one of the tables outside of Greasy’s diner, enjoying a, well,  _ greasy _ lunch. Across from him, Ford chuckled, and leaned back in his chair, the sun shining down on his face.

“It has been a while since we’ve been out, hasn’t it?” he asked. He gave Dipper an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry we haven’t spent as much time together recently, Dipper. I’ve just been so caught up these past couple of weeks or so-”   
“It’s fine,” Dipper interrupted, and then smiled sheepishly. “Don’t worry about it. It’s-” He broke off suddenly, frowning. “Isn’t that the psychic kid?” he asked, pointing out Gideon marching towards them.

“What?” Ford asked, twisting around to look, when suddenly he was yanked up into the air. Dipper yelped in alarm as he jumped backwards from the table, craning his head up to see Ford hanging in midair, unable to move. 

“What are you doing?” Dipper asked Gideon, seeing that the boy was now holding a green gem in his hand. 

“My amulet!” Ford cried. “Where did you get it?”

“Oh, this ol’ thing?” Gideon asked, chuckling evilly. “I found it. Isn’t it great how  _ powerful _ one little trinket can make you?” He met Dipper’s panicked eyes. “And now I’ll use it to get rid of y’all once and for all!”

Dipper yelped again as he was yanked into midair, Gideon laughing maniacally below him. “Why are you doing this?” Dipper yelled. “What did we ever do to you?”   
“Is this because we didn’t like your show?” Ford added. Gideon snorted.

“What? My show? This has nothing to do with that! This is to do with how you are getting in the way of me being with Mabel!”

“Huh?” 

“LEAVE THEM ALONE!” Dipper’s attention was drawn to where Mabel was stood just down the street, hands on her hips, absolutely fuming. Behind her, Stan’s face was grim, his hands clenched into fists. As he watched, Mabel stomped forwards to Gideon and thrust her finger in his face. “You! You know, I thought you were an okay guy! I thought we could be friends! But I guess that I was WRONG!” She pushed him backwards so that he stumbled slightly. “Gideon, I will NEVER, EVER date you. EVER! Maybe before it was a possibility, but then you had to go and hurt my family. This friendship is OVER!” 

She shoved him one last time, and in his moment of unbalance, reached forward and snatched the amulet out of his hand, throwing it to the ground and stomping on it, shattering it into pieces.

In that instant, Dipper and Ford crashed to the ground. “My amulet!” Gideon cried. Dipper looked up just in time to see Mabel give the most terrifying death stare he’d ever seen.

“Get out of here, Gideon,” she said, voice cold. “And you better pray to whatever god you believe in that I never,  _ ever _ see you again.” Gideon made a strange squealing noise, almost like a pig that’d just been stepped on, and then turned and raced away. Dipper stood up slowly as he watched him vanish around the corner.

As soon as he was gone, Stan let out a loud laugh, sweeping Mabel up into a hug and nuzzling her forehead. Mabel giggled. “That was amazing, sweetie!” he cried. “I can’t believe my baby’s all grown up and terrorizin’ boys already. It’s enough to bring a tear to an old man’s eye.” Mabel laughed.

“You’re not old, Dad,” she protested as Stan let her go. 

“Mabel,” Ford said, breaking into the conversation. Mabel turned around, still smiling. 

“Yes?”   
“Thank you,” he said. Mabel blushed.

“It was nothing, really,” she told him. “Oh, by the way!” She reached into her sweater and pulled out the amulet. Ford took it from her, surprise written across his face.

“The amulet!” he gasped. “But how-?”   
“He had a bunch of replicas in his dressing room,” Mabel said sheepishly. “I swiped one because I thought it was cute. I was gonna make it into a hair accessory or something. I thought I should return it to you.”

She held out her hand and Ford reached out as if to take the stone, only to wrap her fingers around it instead. “You should have it,” he told her. “You’ve earned it.” Mabel grinned.

“Thanks, Uncle Ford,” she said, and before anyone could say anything, leaped forward and hugged him. Ford froze for a moment, and then smiled, wrapping his arms around her. 

“You’re very welcome, Mabel.” The two of them broke apart and Ford readjusted his glasses. “Well, I think we should all be getting back,” he said. “It’s been a very… strange day.”

“Heh,” Stan said, wrapping his arm around Ford’s shoulders, “But hasn’t it been fun?” Ford smiled.

“Yes, I think it has.”   
Together, the four of them made their way back through town, headed home.

* * *

That evening, Ford found himself knocking softly on Dipper’s bedroom door. After a moment, it opened, and Dipper blinked up at him, dressed in his pyjamas. With the short sleeves, the scars on Dipper’s arms were exposed, and Ford averted his gaze, trying to wash away the guilt.

“Is there something you wanted?” Dipper asked. Ford nodded, back on track.

“Yes, I uh… Dipper, I am really sorry. About… not being here for you. Today, seeing Stanley and Mabel together… I really haven’t been the best guardian, have I?”

Dipper smiled. “It’s alright. I don’t mind, I like being by myself. And it’s better now that Stan and Mabel are here.” If anything, that just made Ford feel even guiltier.

“But they shouldn’t have to make it better,” he told Dipper. “It shouldn’t have gotten this bad in the first place. But… if you’d like to… We can try and spend more time together from now on. Make up for everything we’ve wasted here.” Dipper paused, thinking, then nodded, and smiled.

“Yeah,” he said. “Yeah, I’d like that.”   
“Good,” Ford said, and smiled back. Before he could stop himself, he reached forward and ruffled Dipper’s hair. “Goodnight, Dipper.”

“Goodnight, Ford!”

Ford turned and walked away, hearing Dipper’s door shut and the turn of the lock as he reached the stairs. He sighed, glancing back, and then made his way down the stairs, passing a carving of a triangle covered with two slashes in the shape of an ‘X’. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was hard-going and was finished later than the previous chapters, but it's finally done! This chapter was a bit of a pain to write, because really, I couldn't figure out how it'd be so different to canon, with Mabel and Stan's plots being basically the same. In the end, I decided to hurry it up and make everything happen in one day, because in this AU, Mabel was raised by Stan, and if there's anything he taught her, it was how to say "no" (and a few slight-of-hand tricks). We also get more Ford/Dipper interaction, because this was the perfect chance to have them spend time together. Originally, I was going to have Ford try to sabotage Gideon, but I couldn't figure out how to make that work, so in the end they just ended up having dinner together. I hope the final showdown with Gideon more than makes up for it though- badass Mabel is so much fun to write!
> 
> Also to note, in this AU, Gideon doesn't have the journal. As Bill's betrayal wasn't realised here at the time it was in canon, Ford never hid his journals, and as such Gideon (or Dipper, for that matter) could never have found them. He just happened to stumble upon the amulet by chance, finding it after Ford had dropped it on one of his expeditions. The journals in general don't play as big a part in this AU, simply because they're not really needed- there's no portal to build, no author to find, and Dipper and Ford have all this knowledge on the supernatural in their heads, so they don't need to carry around the books as much.
> 
> Next chapter: we reunite with the teens for some more shenanigans!


	5. Inconvenient Timing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What do we do now?” Mabel asked, looking around. Wendy shrugged.  
> “Anything we want.”  
> //
> 
> Mabel wants to spend time with Wendy. Stan has a much-needed conversation with his brother.

“Go! Go! Go!” 

Mabel and Wendy’s chanting filled the reading room as Dipper stood and concentrated, narrowing his eyes at the picture of Gideon Mabel had pinned to the wall. Finally, he threw the knife that he was holding, the blade flying through the air and piercing the photo right in the centre of Gideon’s forehead. Behind him, Mabel and Wendy began to cheer.

“Whoo! Yeah!” Wendy yelled, grinning. Dipper smiled sheepishly and handed the final knife to Mabel. Mabel grinned and held the knife in the air before letting go; the knife continued to hover there, surrounded by an eerie green glow. Mabel narrowed her eyes, glancing between the knife and the picture, before sending it speeding through the air. It hit Gideon’s mass of hair, and the sound echoed around the silent room. Dipper and Wendy burst into applause.

“See, I told you it was therapeutic, didn’t I?” Wendy asked, ruffling Mabel’s hair. Mabel laughed.

“Yeah! This was fun. Thanks, Wendy.”   
“No problem, dude,” Wendy said, smiling. “I’m always happy to help a girl get over a douche-y guy. Us gals gotta stick together, you know?” Mabel nodded, still smiling. Suddenly, there was a loud beeping from outside, and the three of them jumped. Wendy walked over to the window and looked through the boards, squinting slightly to see. “Oh, it’s my friends,” she said, straightening up. “We were gonna hang out tonight, I completely forgot.”

“Hang out?” Mabel asked, perking up. “Can we come with you?”

Wendy paused for a moment, thinking. “I dunno… Do you think you kids can keep up?” Mabel and Dipper glanced at each other.

“Did you forget how me met?” Mabel asked, confusedly. Wendy laughed.

“You have a point! C’mon then, let’s go!” 

“Go where?” broke in a fourth voice, and the three of them turned to see Stan standing at the door.    
“Oh, hi Mr. Pines!” Wendy said, waving. “The kids are gonna come hang out with me and my friends, if that’s alright?”

Stan frowned. “How long will you be?” he asked. Wendy shrugged.

“I don’t know. I’ll get them back before midnight, though!” Stan thought for a moment, then shrugged.

“Sure, I don’t see why not. Kids, be careful.” Dipper nodded. Beside him, Mabel saluted and said, 

“Yessir!” 

Stan narrowed his eyes at Wendy, stabbing his fingers toward his eyes and then in her direction. “If anything happens to them, Wendy…” Wendy swallowed, then laughed nervously.

“They’re safe with me, Mr. Pines!”

Stan nodded, then laughed. “Well, what’re you waiting for? Get outta here, you knuckleheads!”   
“Thanks, Dad!”   
“Bye, Stan.”

“See you, Mr. Pines, I won’t let you down!”

The three of them left the house, walking across to Wendy’s friends’ minivan. The door was open, and Robbie was hanging out, a frown on his face.

“Wendy, what’re they doing here?” he asked. Wendy frowned.

“Oh, come on Robbie, they wanted to hang out!”

Robbie didn’t look impressed. “I don’t know…”   
Wendy rolled her eyes. “I know you just don’t like them because they scared the shit out of you.” Robbie scowled.

“Fine.” He turned to the kids and pointed at the back of the van. “Get in, Creeps.” Mabel smiled at a wary Dipper, and together, the two of them got into the back of the van. Wendy climbed in the front beside Robbie, the latter of who turned the Radio up, and then the eight of them blasted away into the evening.

* * *

Stan pulled away from the window, having watched the kids drive away. He sighed, glancing at the door in the opposite wall, the one disguised as a bookshelf, and sighed. Now that the kids were gone… Well, when else could he possibly have this conversation with his brother? Not when they were here, that was for sure. The chances that they could walk in on it, or that the discussion could evolve into an argument, were too high. And he didn’t want to subject them to that.

He sighed, and walked over to the shelf, pulling on one of the books. The shelf swung outwards, and he walked through the gap left behind, shivering at the coolness of the dark pathway.

Slowly, he began to make his way down.

* * *

“There it is,” Wendy said, as the eight of them stood at the fence, “The old Dusk 2 Dawn.”

“What happened to it?” Mabel asked curiously. “Why did they shut it down?”

“The owners were murdered!” Nate said, and Mabel gasped.

“Some folks died in there,” Lee said, rolling his eyes at Nate’s dramatics, “And it’s been closed ever since. They keep looking for someone to buy it, but nobody wants it ‘cause it’s haunted.”   
“Haunted?” Dipper asked, speaking up for the first time since they’d left the house.

“Probably about as haunted as the last place,” Robbie muttered, glaring at the kids. “Are we gonna get over there or what?”

The group climbed the fence, with Mabel being the first across having floated, and Thomson being the last to literally fall from the top.

“Whoa, dude!” Nate gasped to Mabel. “How’d you do that?” Mabel grinned, flipping her hair out of her face. 

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” she asked, hoping to come across all mysterious-y. It seemed to have worked, because Nate stood and watched her follow the others across to the storefront, completely awestruck until Lee ran past and hit him, causing him to chase after him.

“It’s stuck,” Robbie said, pulling on the handle of the door. Wendy frowned and stepped forward, and he moved out of the way to let her try, but the door still didn’t budge.

“Damn, they must have locked it,” Wendy sighed. “Sorry guys, I guess this was a wasted trip…”

“Can I try?” Mabel asked as everyone deflated around her. 

“We couldn’t even get it open, what makes you think you will?” Robbie asked snidely. Wendy gave him a disappointed look.

“C’mon, Robbie, lay off.” She turned back to Mabel and stepped out of the way of the door, gesturing to it. “I don’t see why not.”

Mabel smiled and skipped forward, putting one hand on the lock and the other on the amulet, which hung on a chain, hidden underneath her sweater. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, focusing on the lock; she felt the mechanisms inside, how they worked, and what it would take for them to unlock. Slowly, she urged the mechanisms to move, and they did so, ticking slowly until they clicked to show that the door was open. Mabel opened her eyes and blinked several times, refocusing on the world.

“What is she doing?” Robbie asked, sounding confused and unimpressed. Smiling, Mabel opened the door, and bowed to the teens, gesturing inside.

“Whoa!” Lee cried. “That was amazing!”   
“How did you do that?” Nate added, then shook his head. “Oh yeah, it’s a secret.” Mabel grinned at him from under her hair, and held the door for as long as it took for the others to go inside. Dipper was the last one in, and she let the door drop as the two of them walked in side-by-side.

“Whoa, this is even creepier than I imagined!” Wendy said as they walked through the empty shop. 

“Hey dudes, where do you think they keep the bodies?” Lee asked. Nate laughed, shoving him.

“Shut up, man! Shut up!”

“Check it out!” Wendy called, and the group turned to see her stood by a lightswitch. “Do you think it still works?” She flicked the switches and, after a moment of nothing, the lights flickered to life around them. “Yes!”   
“What do we do now?” Mabel asked, looking around. Wendy shrugged.

“Anything we want.”

* * *

“Stanford?”

Stan entered the lab, walking slowly and looking around cautiously. There was a lot of strange-looking machinery with buttons and knobs and bright lights, and several tables scattered across the remaining floorspace, all of them covered with papers and books and pens and even more strange-looking machines and parts of them. Stan walked through the room, taking notice of the several screwed-up and scribbled on papers, the several pairs of spare and smashed glasses, and the coffee cup that was still half-full and ice-cold. He didn’t even want to think of how old it was.

He came to the end of the room and found himself looking through a window into yet another room. Inside, a large metal structure was coming into existence, the floor around it covered in debris. Amongst it, Ford was crouched, holding two pieces of metal in his hands, seemingly trying to fit them together. Nothing particularly dangerous seemed to be going on, and so Stan opened the door to the second room.

“Stanford!” he called. Ford froze and after a delayed second, dropped the bits of metal back onto the floor, jumping to his feet and whirling around.

“Stanley!” he gasped, a picture of alarm. “What are you doing down here?”

“Look, we need to talk,” Stan started, only to be cut off by Ford.   
“No, no we don’t!” he cried. “What  _ you _ need to do is get out of here, it’s not safe.”

“Sixer, please,” Stan sighed. “I know you don’t want to, but-”

“Get out!” Ford yelled, cutting Stan off once more. The words died on Stan’s lips as he looked up in surprise, seeing, for the first time, the look of pure fear on his brother’s face. “And don’t call me that!”

“...Stanford,” Stan said shakily, “Are you okay?”   
“I’m fine!” Ford insisted. “I’m perfectly fine! I just need you to  _ get out _ !” Stan paused, then nodded, slowly, taking a step back. 

“Fine,” he agreed. “I’ll leave. But only if you come with me.” Ford gave a hysteric-sounding laugh.

“Stanley…” he said, but Stan interrupted him.

“Look, you say its not safe down here for me? Then its not safe down here for you. Especially not-” He cut himself off, but Ford had noticed, and frowned.

“Not?” he prompted. Stan sighed.

“Look, it doesn’t matter-”

“Especially not  _ what _ , Stanley?”

“Especially not in this state!” Stan snapped. “Look at you, Poindexter, you’re falling apart! And while you may not feel that way, you’re still my brother, and I’m- fuck, I’m worried about ya, Stanford!”

Ford’s face was stony. “Get out,” he said quietly. “I won’t ask you again.” Stan squared his shoulders.

“No.”

“No?” Ford persisted. Stan resisted the urge to give in.

“ _ No _ .”

Ford gave a laugh that sounded more like a sob. “Why are you  _ always _ such an  _ inconvenience _ ?” Stan resisted the urge to scream at him. Maybe twelve, heck, even eight years ago, he might have done, but now he could tell that it wouldn’t help. And goddammit, if Ford needed anything, it was  _ help _ .

When they’d arrived here last week, he’d been filled with apprehension and animosity towards his brother, but since then, that animosity had been replaced mostly by worry. The longer he stayed, the more and more he noticed things that set him on edge: the nonsensical writings on the walls; the carvings of triangles with crosses cut through them; the boarded up windows and doors; the weapons lying around, both hidden and in plain sight; the way Dipper spent little time around his brother despite the fact that he’d lived with him all his life according to Fiddleford; hell, everything about Dipper put him on edge. Nothing screamed ‘something isn’t quite right at home’ like that kid’s behaviour.

“Stanford.”   
“No.”

“Stanford, please.” He glanced around before looking back to his brother, holding his hand out to him. “Come upstairs, with me. Just for a little while.” 

Ford opened his mouth, seemingly to refuse, when above him, part of the metal structure sparked and fell from its support, crashing down to the ground. Ford jumped, skirting away from it, and turned to stare, his eyes haunted. 

“Ford,” Stan called. Ford twisted around to look at him, and nodded shakily.

“Okay,” he said, voice quiet and barely audible. 

Together, the two of them left the lab and went upstairs.

* * *

“Whoa, guys, you might wanna see this.”

Mabel walked beside Wendy to where Robbie was sat on the shop counter. “Whoa,” she whispered, seeing the outlines taped onto the floor. 

“Then the rumours are true!” Lee gasped.

“Dude, I dare you to lie down in it,” Robbie told Lee. Lee nodded.

“Good idea!” He turned to Nate. “Go lie down in it!”

“I’m a dead body, look,” Nate joked, walking over to the outlines. Mabel frowned.

“Is this a good idea?” she asked. 

“What, are you scared?” Lee asked. Mabel laughed awkwardly.

“What? No! I’m just saying-”

“Well, you look scared to me,” Robbie teased. 

“I’m not scared!” Mabel stamped her foot in frustration. Robbie grinned.

“Oh yeah? Prove it. Lie down in it.” He pointed at the outlines. Mabel scowled.

“Fine!” she snapped and stamped over to them, dropping down into the lines. “See! I’m not scared!” 

For a moment, everything was fine, and then the lights began to flicker, going out. Around Mabel, the tape outlines began to glow. 

“...Oh no.”

* * *

Stan placed the cup of hot chocolate down on the table in front of Ford before sitting down opposite him and taking a sip from his own cup. Ford was shaking, holding onto the mug so tightly that his knuckles were white. His eyes were still haunted as he stared blankly at the tabletop.

Something was definitely wrong.

“Ford?” Stan called softly. “Stanford.” Ford glanced up, his eyes focusing and unfocusing, before they finally settled on Stan. Stan paused, wondering what exactly he could say in this situation. “...Are you okay?” he finished lamely. 

“I’m fine,” Ford said, teeth chattering. Stan knew better than to push the issue, and nodded.

“Okay. Is there anything you want to talk about?” Ford shook his head almost violently.

“No.”

“When was the last time you ate? Or slept, for that matter?” Ford shrugged. Stan frowned. “Well then, here’s what we’re going to do. I’m going to make you some food, and then you’re going to go up to your room and sleep. For at least twelve hours. Don’t think I won’t wait outside your door.” Ford shook his head.

“You don’t need to do that. I don’t need to sleep. I’m  _ fine _ , Stanley.” Well, his response was longer- that had to count for something, right? 

“Fine you may be, but you’re going to sleep,” Stan told him. “Look at you, Stanford, you’re a nervous wreck.” Ford snorted like he’d just told a joke, staring down into his cocoa. “I’m serious, Poindexter, you can’t keep doing this. Look at you! Look at your house! The state of this place! You can’t keep living like this!”   
“Why not?” Ford asked, glaring at him. “What’s wrong with the way I live?”   
“It’s not healthy, for one!” Stan insisted. “...And it’s not fair. What about Dipper? How does he feel about living like this?”

“Dipper’s fine,” Ford snapped.

“Is he?” Stan asked. “Did you ask him? When was the last time you had a proper conversation with him? I’ve only seen you talk to him,  _ properly _ talk to him,  _ once _ since I got here. Once! It’s been a week! Is this how you normally treat him? ‘Cause that’s not how parents treat their kids, or hell, even how mentors treat their apprentices!”

Ford scowled, but seemed to deflate. “...Fine,” he said eventually. “I’ll eat something. And go to sleep. And talk to him.”

“Okay,” Stan said, nodding. “Okay. That’s fine.” Ford glanced up at him.

“That’s it?” he asked. “You’re not going to make any more unreasonable demands?”

Stan shook his head. “No. That’s enough for today.” He glanced up around the room, which was in a similar state of disarray to the rest of the house. “Whatever’s wrong here… I can’t fix it all in one day. Even I’m not that stupid.” Ford snorted.

“You must be if you think it needs fixing,” he muttered. Stan sighed.

“Okay, Ford, sure. Whatever. In the meantime… I’ll start trying to fix up the house. Make it more livable. Is that okay with you?” Ford shrugged.

“Do what you want,” he muttered. “S’not like you’re gonna listen to me anyway.”

Stan sighed again. He seemed to be doing that a lot these days. “I’ll also try and find some work. I did promise you to be out of your hair by the end of summer, and I’m not one to not uphold my end… Well, I wouldn’t skip out on  _ you _ , in any case.” Ford nodded. 

Stan got up from the table, placing his empty mug in the sink atop a stack of plates, and went to leave the room. He paused at the door. “Don’t forget, I’m keeping an eye on you,” he said. Ford didn’t respond. Just as Stan was about to leave, he said,

“...Thank you, Stanley.”

“...You’re welcome,” Stan replied, and made his way down the hall, smiling slightly.

It wasn’t much. Even if Ford did get the sleep he needed, it likely wouldn’t stop him from falling back into the same cycle again. But that didn’t matter. He’d managed to talk to his brother without it ending in an argument.

And after twenty years of radio silence? That was something.

* * *

“Well that was fun!” Mabel chirped as the group left the store.

“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” Wendy told her, holding an icepack to the bruise on her face. “As for me, I’m probably scarred for life.”

“It was pretty crazy,” Mabel agreed. She smiled at Dipper who was walking beside her, but her smile quickly faded at his blank expression. “You alright, Dipdop?” Dipper shrugged.   
“Fine,” he mumbled. Mabel laughed awkwardly.

“I’m sorry I got you possessed by ghosts.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Dipper told her, and smiled at her. Hesitantly, Mabel smiled back.

“Oh shit, is that the time?” Wendy gasped, checking her watch. “Man, we’re never going to get you kids home in time! Stan’s gonna kill me!”

“Nah, he won’t,” Mabel said, grinning. Then she paused, thinking for a moment. “...I hope?”

* * *

The car pulled up outside the house.

“Here we are,” Wendy said, helping the kids out of the van. “Tonight was great, and all, but next time we hang out, let’s stay here.”

“Fine with me,” Mabel agreed, smiling. She turned and waved at the other teens. “Bye, guys!” They all waved and called their goodbyes, except for Tambry who, as always, said nothing, looking only vaguely unimpressed.

“See ya, magic girl!” Nate called.

“Yeah, see you, Creep!” Robbie called, but this time, ‘creep’ seemed like less of a cruel nickname and more of an inside joke. Mabel beamed.

Together, she, Dipper and Wendy walked over to the front door of the house and pushed it open, hoping to sneak inside. Unfortunately, Stan was stood there, arms crossed.

“And what time do you call this?” he asked, face stormy. The three of them froze.

“Uhm…” Mabel said awkwardly. Dipper’s eyes dropped to the ground. 

“I am so, so sorry, Mr. Pines,” she apologised. “I know, I should have gotten them home when I said I should, time just got away from us and-”   
“Time got away from you, huh?” Stan interrupted. “What were you doing that was so distracting?”

“We broke into a haunted convenience store!” Mabel piped up. Beside her, Wendy winced, flinching, waiting for the argument that would surely result from that.

“Yeah?” Stan asked. Then, “So how was it? You kids have fun?”   
“Huh?” Wendy relaxed, looking up at the smiling man. “You’re not mad that I did illegal activities with your daughter?” Stan shook his head, laughing.

“Nah. Me? Kid, trust me, whatever you’ve done? I’ve probably done way worse.” He laughed, then coughed. “Though, you probably shouldn’t have done it. Responsible adult, and all that.” Wendy laughed.

“Thanks, Mr. Pines.” 

“Yeah, well, get out of here!” Stan said. “...See you next time.”

“Bye!” Wendy turned and walked away. Mabel turned and waved to her as the door swung shut behind her. 

“See you, Wendy!”

“Now,” Stan said as she turned back to the room, “I want to hear everything.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...Stan is a good influence.
> 
> In canon, much of the plot of The Inconveniencing was driven by Dipper's crush on and need to impress Wendy. As that's not really a thing in this AU, instead the plot is driven by Mabel, who loves spending time with Wendy and wants to impress her friends, who are all doubtful of her due to the way they met- which is understandable. I mean, I'd still have a grudge against the person who terrified me for (seemingly) no good reason. Also, since Mabel wants to make a good impression, she stays away from the Smile Dip- and as such, it's Dipper that gets possessed in this AU (though, there was probably no Lamby Dance- as we see in canon, Mabel really has no qualms with dancing, and probably happily danced her little heart out). 
> 
> However the main focus of the plot of this chapter was the Stans, and for a reason, too. For one, the kids' plot in this chapter was very similar to the plot of the actual episode, just with the roles switched, and I find it kind of boring to just reiterate canon. So instead I chose to focus more on the B-plot of this chapter, which was Stan basically sitting Ford down and having an intervention (which, let's be honest, he needs). It's also my way to make up for not featuring them as much as I wanted to in previous chapters. 
> 
> I hoped you like this one! As for what happens next chapter, I'll just give you the title, because it's probably the best thing I've ever come up with: "Mabel vs. the Patriarchy". 
> 
> See you then!


	6. Mabel vs. the Patriarchy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The manotaur snorted. “Sounds to me what you need to do is prove to him that you’re man enough to do it.”  
> “Man enough?” Mabel asked doubtfully. “I’m not a man, though.”  
> “Ah, but that’s the first secret,” the manotaur told her, poking her in the stomach. “You don’t have to be a man to be man enough.”  
> //
> 
> Stan sets up shop, Mabel meets the manotaurs, and Dipper runs in with the gnomes once more.

“I can’t believe you bought this old place, Dad!” Mabel said as she entered the old Dusk 2 Dawn, carrying a box of things in her arms.    
“Yeah, well, we need some way of getting money,” Stan said, laughing awkwardly as he took the box from her and put it on the counter. “Now I need to pay your uncle back as well as trying to afford our own place.”

“Well, you can do it!” Mabel said, grinning at him and giving him a double thumbs up. “I believe in you!” 

“Thanks, sweetie,” Stan said, ruffling her hair. “Go help your cousin with that last box, will you? It’s a heavy one.” Mabel nodded.

“On it!” she chirped, skipping back outside. Sure enough, there was Dipper, struggling with a box that could have been twice the size of him. “I got it!” she called, reaching under her sweater to hold her amulet. The box floated up out of Dipper’s arms, and he gave her a grateful look as he slammed the trunk closed.

“Thanks,” he said, walking over to join her. The box floating above their heads, the two of them made their way back into the store. Stan was talking on the phone as the box landed on the counter.

“That’s great! Okay, when’s that? Yes, thank you… Goodbye!” he slammed the phone down and grinned at them. “Good news, kids! Someone’s already applied to work here!” 

“That’s great!” Mabel exclaimed, then frowned, comprehending the words. “...Wait, what about the us?” Stan frowned.

“What about you?”

“I thought we were gonna be working here!” Stan shook his head.

“What? No! I need people who can do steady shifts, work full-time, and Dipper’s already working with Ford, right Dipper?” Dipper nodded.

“Right.”   
“But what about me?” Mabel protested. “Why can’t I work here?”   
“Because you’re my daughter.”   
“So?”

“You’re too young! And, well…”

“ _ Well _ ?” Mabel put her hands on her hips and glared at him; Stan shuffled awkwardly.

“Nobody’s gonna take this place seriously if we put a little girl behind the counter,” he said eventually. Mabel made a sound of disbelief. Then, without another word, she turned and ran out of the door, Stan shouting after her, 

“Mabel? Mabel! Hey, Mabel, come back!” 

She didn’t come back. 

She just carried on running.

* * *

“Oh, come on!” Stan muttered, staring out of the window as Mabel vanished into the woods. “Now I have to go after her, and she blew this way out of proportion-” There was a sudden ringing of the bell above the door and he turned to see a large man wearing a cap enter the store.

“Hi, I’m uh, here for the interview?” he asked. 

“Oh, right!” Stan said, shaking himself. “I’m Stan Pines, the owner of this fine establishment and your name was…”

“Oh! It’s Soos, dude.” Stan nodded.

“Yes, well, come with me, and we’ll talk… Uh, Dipper!” he called to the kid, who started.

“Yes?”   
“Go after Mabel, will you? Sort this out for me while I deal with this.” He pointed his finger to Soos. Dipper nodded. Stan nodded. “Good kid. Go on, go! Now, Soos, this way…” He ushered Soos into his office just as Dipper disappeared out of the door.

* * *

Mabel sighed, sitting on a log in the woods and shovelling jerky into her mouth. She didn’t even like the stuff that much, but she’d had some on her for some reason and she was upset and hungry. “This is stupid,” she muttered to herself. She didn’t know whether she meant that running off was stupid, or that her dad’s refusal to work was stupid- probably both. She sighed again. “I need help.”

Suddenly, the ground beneath her began to shake. She glanced up, heart in her throat, as animals and birds began running in the opposite direction to the noise. A lumberjack ran past, yelling at her to, “Run!” 

Mabel dropped the jerky and turned to run, but tripped, falling and rolling across the ground. Somewhere, a tree began to fall, and a roar was heard; Mabel screamed as the trunk hit the ground beside her, and curled up in a ball, shaking like a leaf.

She peeked through her arms as a shadow emerged from the trees at the other side of the clearing. It roared, and she quivered, but then it stepped into the light, and the roar became a yawn. Mabel watched in astonishment as the creature scratched itself with a deer and then moved the log she was cowering behind out of the way. Mabel crouched on the ground, staring up at it like a startled rabbit.

“Please don’t eat me,” she said meekly.

“YOU!” the monster bellowed, before coughing and finishing, “Gonna finish that?” Mabel blinked and glanced down to see he was pointing at her uneaten jerky.

“Nope,” she said, and handed it to him, uncurling herself from her ball to sit cross-legged, watching as he began to devour the jerky. “So,” she asked, “What  _ are _ you?”

“I’m a manotaur!” the creature said. “Half man, half… half taur!” 

“Did you come here to help me?” she asked. The manotaur shook his head.

“No,” he said, “I was summoned by the smell of jerky.” He sniffed the air, and then sniffed at Mabel. “I smell… emotional issues.”    
Mabel giggled as he snuffled at her hair, her laughter dying as he pulled away. “Yeah, manotaur, I have problems.” The manotaur gave her a curious look and gestured for her to keep talking. She sighed. “My dad told me I can’t work for him because I’m a ‘little girl’.” 

“Is that so?” the manotaur asked. Mabel nodded miserably.

“It shouldn’t bother me this much, but… he’s my dad! He’s always supported me and told me I could do anything… and now he’s telling me I can’t? Just because I’m a little girl?”

The manotaur snorted. “Sounds to me what you need to do is prove to him that you’re man enough to do it.” 

“Man enough?” Mabel asked doubtfully. “I’m not a man, though.”

“Ah, but that’s the first secret,” the manotaur told her, poking her in the stomach. “You don’t have to be a man to be man enough.” Mabel frowned.

“That doesn’t make any sense.”

The manotaur suddenly stood up. “Hop atop my back hair, child,” he told her. “And I will show you how to become a man.” Mabel hesitated, biting her lip, before shrugging and jumping up, grabbing onto his hair. The manotaur straightened up, and the two of them raced away into the woods.

* * *

“Mabel!” Dipper called. “Mabel, where are you? Mabel!”

He sighed, looking around at the trees on all sides. The forest surrounding Gravity Falls was huge- how was he ever going to find her out here? He didn’t even know where she’d run off to.

He took another step forward and found himself pitching down into a hole. He yelped as he landed on the floor of the pit, and looked up to find several tiny heads poking over the edges of the top. He sighed.

“You guys again?” he called. 

“Yes! It is us!” Jeff the gnome crowed. “Now we have you, and you’ll never escape! And when Mabel comes looking for you, we’ll grab her and force her to marry us!” Dipper frowned up at them.

“Can’t you marry a gnome girl?” he asked. “I don’t really see why you’re going after Mabel…”

“What, are you stupid?” Jeff asked. “There are no gnome girls!” Dipper paused at that.

“There aren’t? But Ford-”

“That fool hasn’t been around,” Jeff said, folding his arms. “They’ve all been murdered, every single one. They’re extinct.” Dipper frowned.

“Who killed them?” he asked. Jeff barked out a laugh.

“Who killed them! Who knows? All we know is this: for the past decade or so, there’s been a beast that stalks these woods. Nobody knows its name or its true face, just that its large and humanoid and has these glowing eyes that legend says will be the last thing you’ll ever see. And this beast has been killing us. Not just the gnomes, but everyone- everyone’s suffering from it. The gobblewonkers are all but extinct, the fae are in hiding, the multibear hasn’t left his cave in years!”

Dipper stared at them in horror. “So this beast… How have I never heard of it?”

“The creatures of Gravity Falls aren’t too friendly to outsiders, or to humans,” Jeff said. “These are our problems, not yours to make worse!”

Dipper paused, thinking for a moment. “If I help you catch this beast,” he called, “Will you leave my family alone?” Jeff gave him a bewildered look.

“Weren’t you listening? This is for the creatures of Gravity Falls to deal with!”

“Gravity Falls is my home too,” Dipper reminded him. “I live up in the woods with the rest of you. Who’s to say the beast won’t suddenly start targeting my family? I want to help.” Jeff pondered for a moment.   
“We need to discuss this,” he said, and then the gnomes withdrew from the top of the pit. Dipper could hear them whispering and sat down to wait. Eventually, the gnomes returned. “We discussed it, and we’ll take the deal. Your help for us leaving you alone.”

Dipper nodded. “I won’t let you down.” He glanced around the hole. “Can uh, can you guys get me out of here?”

* * *

“Multi-bear,” Mabel hummed to herself as she made her way up the mountain. “Multi-bear. What is a multi-bear?” She pulled herself onto the ledge outside of the cave and stood there, staring. She tried her hardest to feel brave, but her grip was too tight on her spear, and her stance was too stiff. Behind her, lightning crashed and thunder boomed.

“Only one way to find out,” she told herself, and plunged into the darkness of the cave.

She couldn’t see much, but that didn’t matter as she soon bumped into the multi-bear. She swallowed, stumbling backwards, as it rose from its slumber, multiple eyes on multiple heads. “So  _ that’s _ a multi-bear,” she whispered.

“Child,” the multi-bear rumbled, “Why have you come here?”

Mabel tried not to shake as she responded, “The manotaurs have sent me to take your head- or one of them, at least.” 

“This is- wait, the manotaurs?” the multi-bear cut himself off, giving her a strange look. “But you’re a girl, are you not?” Mabel sighed, and her whole body seemed to deflate.

“I am, but my Dad told me I couldn’t do something because I’m a little girl, and they told me that to prove myself to him, I needed to become a man, and I…” She trailed off. “I like being stronger, but I- I’m not a man. And they keep  _ treating _ me like one and I… I don’t like it.”

The multibear seemed to relax, sitting down. “Come sit with me, child,” he said. Mabel hesitated, but then dropped the spear, going to sit down beside the multi-bear. “The manotaurs’ society is broken. They have a very specific idea of what it takes to be a man, and if you don’t fit that ideal, they ridicule you and drive you out. Even their own, they have driven out for failing to conform.” Mabel gasped.

“That’s awful!” The multi-bear nodded.

“It is. I have taken in many of their sons and daughters and children who have been cast out, and given them the skills to get by on their own- that’s why they hate me so much, you see. They think that the unmanly are weak, and the weak deserve to die.” Mabel glared down at the ground.

“I can’t believe I listened to them.”

“Do not blame yourself,” the multi-bear rumbled. “Many have been taken in by their lies. Child, know this: you do not have to be manly to be strong. You do not even have to be a man to be strong. You simply need to be yourself.”

Mabel smiled, holding her hand against her chest. “Thanks, multi-bear.”

“You’re very welcome, child.”

“Now,” Mabel said, standing up, “I’m going to go back to the Man Cave. And I’m going to show those manotaurs what  _ real _ strength is.” The multi-bear chuckled.

“Godspeed, child. I wish you the best of luck.” Mabel smiled, and waved as she left the cave.

“Goodbye, multi-bear. Thank you for everything.”

As she made her way down the mountain she found herself running face-first into Dipper. 

“Whoa!” She rubbed her head, laughing.   
“Mabel!” Dipper gasped. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere- what are you  _ wearing _ ?” Mabel glanced down at her clothes.

“It’s a long story,” she said, grinning sheepishly. “But uh, hey, do you wanna come with me to give some manotaurs a piece of my mind?” Dipper blinked several times.

“Uh, sure.  _ What _ ?”

* * *

“You were told!” Leaderaur bellowed. “The price of man is the multi-bear’s head!”

“Maybe so,” Mabel said, folding her arms, “But I’m not a man!” Gasps echoed from the manotaurs. 

“I thought you wanted to man up?” Chutztaur asked. Mabel scowled.

“But I don’t  _ need _ to man up!” she said. “Being manly isn’t the only way to be strong. And I don’t need to be strong to be worth something. I’m that all on my own.”

“Boo!” the manotaurs shouted. “Boo!”   
“You will never be a man,” Leaderaur told her. Mabel shrugged.

“Good,” she said, “I don’t want to be.” She turned on her heel and began to walk away. “Come on, Dipper. Let’s get out of here.”

“What about you, boy?” one of the manotaurs called to Dipper, grabbing at his arm. “Don’t you want to be a man?” Dipper shook his head and pulled away.

“I’m not a boy,” he told the manotaur, “But thanks for asking.” He scurried after Mabel and the two of them left the cave together. Mabel gave him a curious look as they made their way down the mountain.

“You’re not a boy?” she asked. Dipper shrugged.

“Not really.” Mabel nodded. 

“Okay. Have I been calling you wrong, or-” Dipper shook his head. 

“No, it’s fine.” He smiled at her, and she smiled back.

Together they made their way back.

* * *

“Hey there, kids!” Stan greeted as Dipper and Mabel entered the shop. “This is Soos, the new handyman.”

“S’up, dudes!” Soos greeted.

“And Wendy’s working the counter,” Stan added, pointing to where Wendy was sat. 

“Hey guys! Mabel, man, I heard you got upset, what’s up?”

Mabel shook her head. “I’m fine now,” she told her. “Well… almost.” She turned to Stan and gave him a disapproving look. “Say you’re sorry,” she said. Stan paused.

“What?”   
“Say you’re sorry, and I’ll forgive you, and then we can move on,” Mabel said. Stan nodded.

“Well then, I’m sorry that I told you you couldn’t work because you were a little girl.”

“I forgive you,” Mabel said, then grinned. “Looks like you fixed this place up pretty nicely!”

“Ha, yeah,” Stan said, glancing around. “It still needs a bit of work, but it should be open for business soon!” He ruffled her hair. “Everything’s coming together, huh?”

“Yeah,” Mabel said smiling, glancing across at Dipper. “Yeah, it is.”

* * *

“So there’s a beast in the forest?” Mabel gasped. Night was falling outside, and the two of them were sat in Dipper’s room. Dipper nodded.

“Yeah, and it’s killing everything,” he told her. Mabel stared.

“That’s awful,” she said. Dipper nodded.

“I told the gnomes I’d help them find whatever it is, and deal with it,” he said. “I don’t think I can do it, though.” Mabel shook her head.

“What? No! Of course you can!”

Dipper shrugged. “Not alone, though,” he said, and gave her a small smile. Mabel gasped and squealed, a bright smile overtaking her face. 

“Are you asking me to help you? Yes! This is gonna be so much fun!”

“Fun?” Dipper questioned. “We’re chasing a serial murderer here, Mabel.” 

“Well, yeah,” Mabel relented, “But I have my amulet and you have your knives and we have each other. It’ll be fine! We’ll be like, the mystery cousins or something.”   
“Mystery cousins?” Dipper raised an eyebrow. Mabel nodded.

“Mm! It’ll be great, just you wait and see.”

* * *

At the top of the mountain, the multi-bear lay in his cave, staring up at the stone walls. Outside, a storm raged, the wind howling through the rock and lightning flashes illuminating the darkness every few minutes. His eyes drooped closed as the sound of the rain against stone lulled him to sleep.

Suddenly, he was jolted awake, roused by the sound of footsteps outside of his cave. He sat up, turning toward the entrance, but in the darkness, he couldn’t make out anything of his visitor but their humanoid shape. “Who’s there?” he called, but the stranger didn’t reply, instead making his way into the cave. The multi-bear tensed as the figure came to a halt just before him, standing still and not uttering a word. The silence of the moment was only interrupted by breathing, and the far-away sound of the rain outside.

Lightning flashed, and for the first time, the multi-bear saw his visitor in detail. It was enough to make him relax. “Oh, it’s you,” he said. “What brings you here on this night?”

The visitor looked upwards, and the multi-bear felt a sudden onset of dread. He’d made a fatal mistake.

“Oh, no,” he whispered.

The beast with the glowing eyes grinned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is actually shorter than the others, but I hope it's not bad...? I decided to carry on the theme of the canon episode about toxic masculinity, but it was also based on my feelings towards that brand of feminism that makes all "strong female characters" into "male characters but with boobs". That's not what feminism's about, that's not what being strong's about, and that's not even what it takes to be a girl. Mabel doesn't have to be "man enough" to be valid, she doesn't even have to be strong- she just has to be herself. Hopefully I managed to capture that.
> 
> Also, Dipper is canonically agender in this AU! I've been waiting to drop that one for a while, and a chapter about gender seems to be the perfect place to do so. And I've finally introduced the main mystery of the fic- the beast. In this AU, there's no author, and so instead Dipper's main mission- the mystery he has to solve- is that of "what is the beast that is destroying the woods around Gravity Falls?". I tried to drop hints, but also to not be too obvious- hopefully it worked? 
> 
> (And before you criticise Stan for not letting Mabel work because she's a "little girl"- would you feel comfortable being served by a twelve-year-old? I can't even get a job at sixteen, let alone twelve; though, that might have something to do with how I LOOK twelve.)
> 
> Next chapter, the cousins go to a party! Hopefully things won't end in disaster for them...


	7. Quadruple Cousins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Dad asked me to copy some flyers for the party he’s holding down at the store.”  
> “And that somehow resulted in you copying yourself?” Mabel paused for a moment, thinking, then nodded.  
> “Yes!”  
> //
> 
> Mabel's out to make friends- and this time, she has some help.

“Hey, Mabel, sweetie, do me a favour?” Stan called. Mabel glanced up from her notepad, where she was doodling concepts of what the beast could look like. “Take these down to the photocopier in Ford’s office and copy them for me?” Mabel nodded and jumped up, taking the papers from Stan.

“Ooh, a party?” she asked in excitement, glancing up at him. Stan nodded.

“Gotta rake up excitement for the store somehow.” Mabel tipped her head to the side curiously.

“Do stores usually throw parties to celebrate opening?”   
“Well, they do now! Or at least, this one does.” Mabel grinned.   
“I like it!” She turned and walked away, waving the flyer in the air. “I’ll go copy this!” She skipped out of the room and down the hall, pushing open the door to Ford’s office. It was dark inside, with the window, much like every other window, boarded up. She flicked the light switch several times but nothing happened.

Shrugging, she made her way into the room and began to play around with the copier, trying to figure out how it worked. She placed her hand on the top as she reached up and pressed a button, and suddenly the think sparked, a light scanning over her arm. She jumped backwards as the machine made an unhealthy sound and spat out a piece of paper. She walked over to it and picked it up, looking at the picture of her arm.

“Nice,” she said. Suddenly the picture crumpled by itself and she dropped it out of shock, watching in horror as the arm popped out of the page and into existence. She stared at it in astonishment then squealed, skittering backwards as it dragged itself towards her. She tripped over a table, knocking both it and herself over; the half-empty glass of water fell onto the paper and disintegrated the arm out of existence. Mabel stared in astonishment.

“Mabel, is everything okay?” Stan yelled. Mabel glanced up.

“I’m fine!” she called back. “I just knocked something off the table, don’t worry!”   
“Okay!”

Mabel stared back at the mass of sodden paper, and a slow grin spread across her face.

* * *

“Hey Dipper,” Mabel greeted slyly, sliding into the room. Dipper glanced up from his book.

“Hi, Mabel,” he greeted, suspicious at the grin on her face. “What’s up?”   
“Oh, nothing much,” Mabel said, leaning casually against the wall. “I just thought that I should introduce you to my secret twin.” Dipper raised his eyebrow.

“You don’t  _ have _ a twin.”

“Oh, but I do!” Mabel said brightly. “You just haven’t noticed because we’ve never been in the same room at the same time!”

Dipper stared. “...Right,” he said. “So where’s this secret twin then?”

“Right here,” Mabel said, and gestured at the doorway. The curtains there rippled, and then Mabel stepped out. 

“Hey, Dipper!” the second Mabel greeted brightly. Dipper stared.

“Oh. Okay then,” he said, blinking several times. He glanced between them, trying to figure out differences, but couldn’t find them. “Mabel, where did she come from?”

Mabel pouted. “Aww, it didn’t work!”   
“Mabel,” Dipper prompted, waving a hand at her double. Mabel nodded.

“Oh! Right! Well, you know that old photocopier in Uncle Ford’s office-”

“What were you doing in there?” Dipper asked.

“Dad asked me to copy some flyers for the party he’s holding down at the store.”

“And that somehow resulted in you copying  _ yourself _ ?” Mabel paused for a moment, thinking, then nodded.

“Yes!”

Dipper stared and then glanced back down at his book. “Okay.”   
“What, you’re not impressed?” Mabel asked. Mabel shook his head.

“This is going to end badly, and I want no part in it.” Mabel pouted.

“Pssh, this isn’t going to end badly, what are you talking about?” Mabel laughed, waving a hand dismissively. “Come on, Mabel-two, let’s go hang out- without Mx. Depressing over here.”

“Bye, Dip!” the second Mabel called as the two of them disappeared out of the door. Dipper glanced up from the page, watching the curtain shift and then fall still, biting his lip thoughtfully. Then he shrugged and looked back down, returning to his reading.

* * *

“What about  _ this _ one?” Mabel asked, holding up a sweater in front of her. Her double narrowed her eyes at it and tipped her head to the side, making contemplative noises as she considered it.

“Hmm, yes, right, I think… That it looks perfect!” she said, springing upright and grinning. “Oh, you should match it with that super cute bow Sarah bought you last year!” Mabel’s eyes widened.

“Oh!  _ That _ one! Yeah, I have it here somewhere…” She knelt down and rummaged through her suitcase, feeling the silky texture of the ribbon and pulling it out from underneath everything else. She held it up in the air and the two of them admired it for a moment.

“Now  _ you _ help  _ me _ decide,” her double said. She grinned, holding up two sweaters on coathangers. “I narrowed it down to these two, but I just can’t decide!”

Mabel considered the sweaters, glancing between the two. “But they’re both so beautiful!” she said, and her double sighed, nodding knowledgably. 

“I know, right?”

“Hmm… I think you should go with that one,” she said, pointing. “It would go so well with those earrings Sarah bought me!” She turned and rummaged through the draw and picked out the ones she meant, flashing the pair at her double. “These ones!”

“Yes!” her double agreed, taking them and fastening them in her ears. Mabel watched her, and as she did so, her smile slipped. She looked down at the ribbon lying on her chosen outfit and frowned.

“Are you alright?” her double asked, turning around. Mabel looked up and nodded.

“Mmm-hmm!” Her double’s eyes had already dropped to the ribbon, her hands rising to the earings. 

“Forget about her,” she told Mabel. “She doesn’t matter anymore.” Mabel smiled.

“Yeah, you’re right.” She laughed. “I’m not going to think about her for the rest of the night!” she proclaimed, pulling her sweater off in order to change. Her double grinned.

“Atta girl!” Then, she paused. “Should I choose a different name? You know, to avoid confusion.” Mabel paused for a moment, then gasped in excitement.

“Oh, I know! I can be May, and you can be Bell- and together, we’re Mabel!” Her double gasped.

“That’s brilliant!” The two of them shared conspiratorial grins and before returning to getting changed. “You should wear those glow-in-the-dark earrings,” Bell said. May glanced up and nodded.

“Yeah, you’re right!”

“Of course I am! That’s the power of-”   
“Mabel!” the two of them chorused, and burst out laughing.

* * *

“Hey kid!” Stan greeted as he and Mabel entered the reading room. “You coming down to the store with us?” Dipper glanced up from his book, squashing annoyance from being interrupted for the second time that day.

“No,” he replied.

“Aww, come  _ on _ , Dipper!” Mabel protested. “It’ll be fun! What are you going to do, just stay in like you do every night?”   
“Yes,” Dipper replied bluntly. Mabel sighed.

“Please, Dipper?” she begged, giving him her best puppy-dog eyes. “For me?” Dipper sighed, and then tried not to perk up as an idea came to mind.

“Fine,” he sighed, closing his book and getting up. “Just give me a minute.” Mabel beamed brightly, bobbing up and down.

“Yay!” she cheered as Dipper made his way back into the house. “Thank you, Dip!”

Dipper hurried down the hall and, checking to make sure no one was following him, darted into Ford’s office. He took a moment to turn the key in the lock, and then turned toward the copy machine.

A minute later, he was stood staring at a perfect replica of himself. “This is weird,” they both muttered at the same time, freezing and staring at each other with wide eyes, and then laughing softly. 

“You know the plan?” Dipper asked. His double nodded.

“On it. You can count on me.” Dipper nodded. His double hesitated for a moment, holding his hand out before dropping it and awkwardly dipping his head as he backed up. Eventually he just raised his hand in a half-wave; Dipper mirrored the gesture as he watched his clone exit the room and make his way down the hall. He made his own way to the door and waited there, listening as Mabel greeted him and the three of them left the house. After a minute, he heard the car pull away.

Assured that they had left, he made his way back into the reading room and climbed back into place on the chair, picking up his book and beginning where he left off.

* * *

Mabel was buzzing excitedly as she watched everyone enter the store parking lot. It was dark out, and the area was lit by a string of fairy lights they’d found in the back; the store doors were open, and there were tables filled with foods and drink. Soos, the store’s new handyman, was DJ’ing, and Wendy and Dipper were stood at the entrance to the lot, taking in admission fees beside Stan. As her friends entered, Wendy broke away and followed her, leaving just Stan and Dipper there.

In the crowd, she spotted Bell, who had just slipped in and casually handed her fee to Dipper, keeping her head down in order to avoid Stan’s recognition. As she made it past the bottleneck, she stopped and glanced around; Mabel raised her hand to wave. Bell spotted it and made her way over through the crowd.

“Heya!” she greeted, leaning on the table beside Mabel and grabbing a drink. The two of them shared identical grins and knocked their cups together, drinking from them. “So, what’s the plan?”   
Mabel shrugged. “Have fun! Dance, eat, make some friends- the usual.” Bell nodded, taking another sip from her drink.

“This is our first chance to make friends in this town,” she said. “We have to make it count!” Mabel nodded.

“Yeah!”

The two of them finished their drinks in unison and placed the empty cups down on the table.

“Let’s get started.”

* * *

Mabel was dancing, spinning around in circles, when all of a sudden, she found herself bumping into someone. She glanced up to see a face looking down at her, and spun around, looking up at the girl who’d been dancing there.

“I’m sorry!” she apologised hurriedly. The girl shook her head.

“It’s fine!” she said, her voice gruff and loud. Mabel was about to say something else when her eyes caught sight of a lizard resting on the girl’s shoulder. “Wow! You have an animal on your body! I’m Mabel.”

“I’m Grenda,” the girl said. She gestured to a smaller, asian girl stood beside her. “This is Candy.”

Candy waved; Mabel saw the glow-in-the-dark rings on her fingers, and her eyes lit up. “Those are so cool!” she gushed, taking her hand and looking at the rings. “You have so many!”

“I will be able to find my way in the dark always,” Candy agreed seriously. Mabel looked between Candy and Grenda, a grin spreading across her face.

“Girls, I think I’ve found my people,” she said. Grenda looked around.

“Huh? Where?” Mabel reached out her hands and pressed a finger into each of their chests.    
“Right here!” They looked down at her fingers and then back at her, and then the three of them were grinning identically.

Suddenly, their attention was drawn by a group of girls making their way through the crowd. At the head of them was a girl with long blonde hair and a scowl on her face. Behind Mabel, Candy and Grenda made noises of disgust.

“Who’s that?” Mabel asked curiously.

“The most popular girl in town,” Candy proclaimed, “Pacifica Northwest.”

“When I’m around her, I always feel bad about myself,” Grenda added.

As if summoned by their words, Pacifica bumped into them, seemingly accidentally-on-purpose. She turned around and sneered. “Why, if it isn’t lizard girl and glow fingers!” she drawled. She looked them up and down. “I hope none of you were planning on entering the karaoke contest later; after all, you can’t really compete-” another once-over, another sneer- “With  _ me _ .”

“Our kind isn’t welcome here,” Candy lamented as Grenda grabbed her into a hug.

“Hold me!”

“I’ll compete!” Mabel announced, taking a step forward, hands balled at her sides. Pacifica raised an eyebrow.

“And who might you be…?”   
“I’m Mabel,” Mabel told her. Pacifica laughed.

“That sounds like a fat old lady’s name!”

Mabel didn’t hesitate. “I’ll take that as a compliment!”

Pacifica turned to her friends and stage-whispered the word, “Weirdo!” Then she turned back to Mabel. “Well then, I’ll see you later. May the best…” She took a step back. “Partier…” Another step. “Win!” She spun on her heel and marched off.

“Nice meeting you!” Mabel called after her with faux cheer, before rounding on Candy and Grenda, seething with righteous anger. “She’s going  _ down _ .”

* * *

 

Mabel found Bell by the drinks table as she prepared to sing. “Hey,” she greeted, breathlessly, downing an entire cup. “I’m about to totally own Pacifica Northwest at karaoke. What about you?” Bell didn’t meet her eyes.

“About that… maybe you shouldn’t,” she said. Mabel stared at her.

“Bell, what are you  _ talking _ about? I have to! For my honour! For my friends’ honour!” Bell winced.

“Pacifica isn’t  _ that _ bad,” she mumbled. “You could be friends if you tried.” Mabel gaped.   
“What? Bell, she makes fun of people for being weird! Everything about me is weird, that’s who I am! Why would you say that, I don’t- are you  _ friends _ with her?” Bell flinched but otherwise didn’t say anything. Mabel didn’t care; that was enough. “Fine then,” she said coldly. 

“May…” Bell said, glancing at her.

“I guess we’re enemies now,” Mabel announced haughtily. 

“May!” Bell yelped. “I thought we weren’t gonna do the whole, clones-turn-on-each-other thing?”

Mabel didn’t listen, already up on her way over to the DJ booth, where the competition would take place. “I’ll see you on the dancefloor,” she called, briefly spinning around to walk backwards in order to lock eyes with Bell. “May the best partier win.”

* * *

Mabel watched over the crowd as she and Pacifica stood onstage.

“Uh-oh, it’s a tie!” Soos proclaimed. “This has like, never happened before.” Before anything else could be said, a fourth person made their way onto the stage and grabbed the mic from him. Mabel gasped.

“Bell!” she cried, in chorus with Pacifica beside her. Bell gave them both a  _ look _ , and then smiled, before spinning around and bursting into song. Mabel and Pacifica stood side-by-side, united for the first time that night by their confusion and bewilderment.

_ She’s my clone, how come she’s better at singing than I am? _ Mabel wondered as Bell finished her song. The entire crowd burst into applause which Mabel realised, with a sinking feeling, was louder than both her and Pacifica’s responses.

“Well then, the winner is this little dude!” Soos proclaimed, and stuck the party crown on Bell’s head. “What’s your name, dude?”   
“Bell,” Bell said proudly, raising her chin. She then laughed. “This was fun! Thank you all!” 

The crowd began to drift away. Pacifica turned on Bell. “What were you thinking? I was supposed to win!” she cried.

Bell sighed. “Because if either of you had won, you could’ve never been friends,” she explained. “Pacifica, you’re great! I just met you and you’re like, my best friend, girl. But May’s like a sister to me. How could I live with myself if you two never got the chance to be at least  _ friendly _ to each other?”

Mabel glanced to the side at Pacifica; Pacifica glanced at her. “I guess,” Mabel muttered. She turned to Pacifica and held out a hand. “Truce?”

Pacifica pulled a face, glanced at Bell’s hopeful expression, and sighed. “Truce,” she sighed, and took Mabel’s hand. Bell grinned.

“Yay! We’re all sorted.” She reached up to her head and pulled the crown off, handing it to Pacifica. “Here, have this. We never wanted it anyway.” She put her arm around Mabel. Pacifica hesitated.

“My parents told me not to accept charity,” she said, averting her eyes. Bell giggled.

“Charity?! Paz, it’s a present. From one friend to another. Please?” Pacifica hesitated, then took it, placing it atop her head. Bell laughed and gave her a thumbs up. “See? Pretty as a princess.”   
Pacifica laughed awkwardly. “Stop it,” she said, a light blush on her cheeks. Her eyes caught sight of someone in the crowd and she coughed, sobering up again. “I’m going to go meet with the girls. Thanks, Bell. Bye, Mabel.”

“Bye!” Mabel called, waving as she left.

“See you!” Bell added. The two of them stood there, arms wrapped around each other, looking over the party. A call from the bottom of the stage caught their attention; Candy and Grenda were stood, holding balloons and glow sticks.

Mabel glanced at Bell. “Wanna come party with us?” she asked. Bell grinned.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

* * *

As the party dragged on, Candy, Grenda, and Pacifica had all left, and so Mabel and Bell had found themselves talking with Dipper. At some point, they’d relocated from the dance floor to the store roof, and sat up there, drinks in hand, watching the stars.

“Tonight was fun,” Mabel said. 

“Yeah,” Bell sighed happily. She glanced over at Dipper. “What about you, Dip? You have fun?” Dipper shrugged, dipping his head.

“It was alright,” he said. Mabel grinned.

“I told you you’d enjoy it!” she told him. Dipper smiled.

“Yeah,” he said, “You did.”

“This night wouldn’t have been the same without either of you,” Mabel continued. “I’m so glad you were both here.”   
“I’m glad I was here too,” Bell said. The three of them sat in silence for a moment, staring out over the party. Mabel shivered as she felt a few drops of water land on her. 

“It looks like it’s starting to rain,” she commented, looking to Bell, only to see her double melting. “Bell!” she cried in alarm. Bell laughed.

“Oh, is it time to go already?” she said, her voice touching on hysterics. 

“Bell,” Mabel breathed.

“It’s fine,” Bell told her. “It’s fine!” She barked a maniacal laugh. “Just, do me a favour, will you? Look out for Paz.” Mabel watched in horror as Bell’s body melted away as the rain grew worse around them. “No, nope, forget calm, I can’t do this! I can’t!”   
“Bell,” Mabel cried and reached out, grabbing Bell’s disintegrating hand. “It’s okay, I’m here.”   
Bell sobbed. “I don’t want to die,” she whispered. “Help me, May, I don’t want to die.”   
“It’s okay,” Mabel told her, tearing up. “It’s okay, I’m here, I’m here.”    
Bell squeezed her hand as her own melted away through Mabel’s fingers. “May, May, May,” she said, laughing. “May…”   
“Yeah?” Mabel pressed. “I’m here.”

“Thank you…” Bell breathed, and then she was gone.   
Mabel sat there in shock, tears streaming down her face as she stared at the mess of wet paper that had once been her clone. “I won’t forget you,” she whispered, closing her hand and holding it to her chest. 

Taking a moment, she took a deep breath, then turned to her cousin. “Come on, Dip, let’s-” She broke off, seeing nothing but a pool of melted paper where he’d been sat. She stared blankly for a moment, not understanding, before she realised what he’d done. “Oh, that-”   
“Mabel!” called a familiar voice. She glanced down to see Stan stood below, staring up at her. “Get down from there sweetie, we’re leaving!” 

Around them, the rain had become a downpour, and the parking lot was abandoned as everyone had scrambled home. She nodded. “Coming!” she called, and scrambled down the side of the building. 

“Where’s Dipper?” Stan asked as they made a dash for the car.

“He went home early,” Mabel lied. Stan nodded.

“Okay then. Come on, get in.” He opened the door for her and she scrambled into the front seat, fastening her seatbelt as Stan got in the other side. “Brr. Let’s get home,” Stan said. “We can get dry and have some hot chocolate and hope we don’t catch cold, how does that sound?”   
Mabel nodded, smiling. “Sounds good, Dad.”   
“Right then.”

Stan turned the keys in the engine and the two of them drove away into the night.

* * *

On the other side of town, Pacifica was sitting in her room, staring out of her window into the rain. Dressed in her nightgown, she held the party crown in her lap, her hands tracing over the patterns on the side. It really was a tacky thing; she didn’t know why she even wanted it in the first place. To prove that she was better than everyone, maybe. That sounded about right.

She glanced down at it and sighed, placing it on her head. She glanced at her reflection in the surface of the darkened windowpane and tilted her head to one side, and then the other. “Pretty as a princess,” she whispered, then puffed out a breath. She tore the crown from her head and dropped it to the floor, where it rolled across the carpet. “As if.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was hard to write. This chapter took a baseball bat and started beating me with it. This chapter was so frustrating that I took a week to write it and for that I apologise. I hope it makes up for the wait.
> 
> Also, literally everyone guessed who the beast is. I'm not upset because I wasn't exactly subtle, but in case there's someone who didn't figure it out, could you guys avoid commenting about it? If I can surprise at least one person, I will.
> 
> Originally this chapter was going to be called "Multiple Mabel" and was going to feature a multitude of Mabel clones that all ran out into the woods and got into trouble, prompting Mabel and Dipper to go chasing after them. But I couldn't make it work, so this is what happened instead. I think this chapter was so hard to write because honestly, I didn't like the episode Double Dipper. I just didn't enjoy it, and so it was hard writing this reimagining of it and enjoying it at the same time. However, I did find the last half of the chapter came so much more easily to me than the first half, and I actually found myself having fun- so hopefully you all did, too.
> 
> I was going to have Bell's death scene be pretty similar to Tyrone's, until I read a post on tumblr that pointed out how telling that was of Dipper's character, that when we see his clone die he's actually pretty cool about it and telling Dipper not to be upset. And that got me thinking, and I don't think that Mabel would be that calm about dying. While I'm sure Dipper would be terrified, he'd try to stay calm for the sake of everyone else- Mabel, on the other hand, wouldn't be able to hide it, she'd just freak out. And so that's what Bell does- she freaks out. 
> 
> And as for Pacifica, she and Mabel get off to a similar bad start as to their canon counterparts- except that, by the end of their first meeting, they've called a tentative truce. Pacifica having more of a sympathetic role from the start wasn't really my intention, but as I wrote this chapter, I found it just made sense. She'll definitely be having more of a role in the future (and every day, this AU becomes more and more similar to Reunion Falls...).
> 
> Next chapter, it's Pioneer Day. See you then!


	8. Conspiracy Nuts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “The hell is ‘Pioneer Day’?” Stan asked, squinting at the flyer.  
> //
> 
> The twins recruit Pacifica to help them solve a mystery. Ford has a very bad day.

“The hell is ‘Pioneer Day’?” Stan asked, squinting at the flyer he’d found under the wipers of his car the night before. Across the room, Ford looked up from his writings, looking vaguely annoyed.

“It’s just some stupid local holiday,” he said. “The townspeople all pretend its 1863 in order to celebrate the founding of Gravity Falls. I haven’t bothered with it in years.” He returned to his work for a moment, only to raise his head a moment later to add, “You might want to avoid opening the shop today, it gets a little chaotic.”

“Are you kidding?” Stan asked. “If it’s as busy as you say it is, there’ll be way more customers than usual! I could really rake up a profit here!”

Ford rolled his eyes. “Your funeral,” he muttered, picking up his pen again.

“In fact,” Stan continued, thinking out loud, “We’ll all go! The four of us!”

Ford’s head snapped up. “What? No. Absolutely not. It’s out of the question.”

“C’mon, Poindexter,” Stan sighed. “You gotta get out more! You’re coming into town today, and you’re gonna enjoy it!”

“I am _not_ going to enjoy it,” Ford said. “I’m going to _hate_ it and I’m going to complain the whole time and you’ll wish you’d left me at home.”

“But you’ll come,” Stan said, raising an eyebrow. Ford sighed.

“I don’t really have a choice, do I?”

“Nope!”

“Joy.”

“Kids! Kids, come on!” Stan yelled down the hall. After a moment, Dipper came scurrying down the stairs, and Mabel skipped down the hall from the TV room. “We’re all going into town today. The four of us.”

Mabel grinned, brightening up. “What’s the occasion, Dad?” she asked excitedly.

“This is,” Stan said, handing her the Pioneer Day pamphlet. Mabel grabbed it and read it through several times, her smile growing wider and wider.

“Here,” she said, shoving the flyer into Dipper’s hand, “I’ll be right back, I’m gonna go dress up like someone from 1863!” She turned and raced down the hall, before stopping short and spinning around. “Wrong way!” she called as she dashed down the hall and around the corner, out of sight.

Dipper looked down at the flyer in his hands.

* * *

“This is all so exciting!” Mabel gasped, looking around the town with bright, excited eyes. She was holding onto Dipper’s arm as she looked around, the two of them walking just ahead of the adults on their way to the store. “Look! Candle dipping! Gold panning!” She shook Dipper’s arm. “Umm… Woodpecker marriage? Wh-aaat?”

“In Gravity Falls, it used to be legal to marry woodpeckers,” Dipper explained, averting his eyes from the scene.

“Oh, no, it’s still legal,” Ford said with a sniff. “This town has some very… _strange_ , laws, shall we say.”

“Well, as long as they don’t kick me out, I don’t care what these kooks wanna do with their lawmaking power.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a stack of paper, separating it into two piles, giving one each to the kids. “Here, hand these out,” he said. “I’m gonna set up the store.” He turned around. “Ya comin’, Poindexter?”  
“No, thank you,” Ford said. “I’m… I’m gonna keep an eye on the kids. Some weird people tend to crawl out of the woodwork on days like this.” Stan paused for a moment, then nodded.

“Good on ya. See you, then!” He walked away.

“You don’t have to babysit us,” Mabel told him. “We can handle ourselves!”

“Mmm, I know,” Ford said with a nod. “I just didn’t feel like spending all day with Stan.”

Mabel frowned. “Okay… Don’t you like him?” Ford paused at that.

“What? No, um, of course I like him.” He wouldn’t meet her eyes. “It’s just complicated, Mabel, that’s all.”

Mabel was about to ask more when someone called, “Come one and all for the opening ceremony!” Distracted, she grabbed Dipper’s hand and raced over to the stage, slipping through the congregating crowd to the front. “Come on!”

“Here-ye, here-ye! Ye olde commencement ceremony is about to begin!”  
“Whoo! I get a bell!”

“Howdy, everyone!” called a familiar voice. Mabel brightened up.

“Oh, hey, it’s Pacifica!” Dipper frowned.

“Who?”

“You all know me, Pacifica Northwest, great-granddaughter of town-founder, Nathaniel Northwest. I’m also very rich.”

“Oh, right,” Dipper mumbled. “That was a lie, I don’t know her at all.”

“Now if you’ve got the pioneer spirit, come on up and introduce yourself!”

Mabel gasped. “Me! I do!” She jumped up onto the stage and walked over.

“And our first newcomer is…” Pacifica started, still smiling at the audience, “...Mabel!”

“Yeah!” Mabel whooped. “Let’s get this Pioneer Day started, right guys? USA! USA!”

As the crowd joined in her chant of “USA!”, Pacifica placed her hand over the microphone and turned to talk to her. “Is Bell here with you?” she asked. Mabel glanced away awkwardly.

“No, uh, she… died.”  
“Oh, okay… Wait, _what_?”

“Yeah there was a… car accident, on her way home…”  
“Oh,” Pacifica breathed, looking horrified. “My goodness…”

Mabel spotted the tears in her eyes and glanced around at the crowd. “You, uh, wanna go hang out somewhere more private? I mean, it’d be awful to be upset here, in front of everybody…”

Pacifica blinked in surprise. “I, uh… I have to finish this. But afterwards, I could come and find you…?”

Mabel nodded. “I’ll stick around.”

Pacifica uncovered the mic and turned back to the crowd, her smile just a little more fake, her expression just a little more strained. “Give her a hand everybody!”

* * *

“These aren’t my glasses,” Ford mumbled as he sat not too far away from the stage, listening to the cries of, “USA!” carrying over the town. He took them off and peered at the too-small round frames, frowning. “Where did I get these? Why did I put them on? How did I not even notice until now?”

“Hey, you,” barked a vaguely familiar voice. Ford turned to see the town’s two police officers watching him with narrowed eyes. “We haven’t seen you around here before… what’s your name, stranger?”

Ford scowled. “I’m Stanford Pines, I’ve lived in this town for seventeen odd years.”

“Is that so,” the sheriff said suspiciously. “‘Cause it’s 1863, and there hasn’t been a town here until now. And those clothes of yours look mighty suspicious…”

Ford glanced down at his outfit; a long coat, dark trousers, a waistcoat, and a frilly-topped shirt. He’d just picked the first historical-looking thing out of his wardrobe; he didn’t think they looked suspicious at all. “What? This stuff is all pretty historical… 19th century and all that, I think…?”

“But it’s 1863,” the sheriff reminded him. “Deputy Durland, I think we’ve got a time traveller in our midst.”

“A what?” Ford exclaimed, flabbergasted. "But 1863 is in the 19th century!"

"Nice try," the sheriff said. "If it's the _18_ 00's, how could it be the _19_ th century?"

Ford gaped. "...You're both _idiots_." The officers paid him no mind.

“What’re we gonna do, Blubbs?” the deputy asked the sheriff.

“Yes, what are you going to do?” Ford asked suspiciously.

“I think it’s time,” Blubbs said seriously, sinisterly, “To break out… _Ye Olde Stocks_.”

“Oh, for _God’s_ sake.”

* * *

Pacifica sniffed, the Pines cousins sat on either side of her on the bench. “Ugh, this is stupid,” she muttered, wiping at her eyes. “I can’t believe I’m so upset… I knew her for like, a few hours at _most_.”

Mabel nodded, glancing away. “It’s… Sometimes you meet people that are just like that. People that are so full of life, they make you feel full of life, too. And when they’re gone… All of that feels more fragile, and you feel empty, and you miss their energy… And you’re just sad.” She turned her head back and smiled at Pacifica. “And it hurts and it sucks, and you just sit and cry, and then you can’t cry anymore and things are just blah. And then people start to worry about you, so you pretend to be happy, and eventually, you begin to feel happy again. You move on, but you don’t forget them- how could you? You just have to try and honour them, and make other people feel like they made you feel…”

“Whoa,” Pacifica whispered, staring wide-eyed. “That was deep, Mabel.”  
Mabel smiled and shrugged. “Not really. Bell would have come up with something _way_ better.”

“Well, Bell’s not here,” Pacifica muttered, but then smiled. “But for what it’s worth, I’m glad you are.”

“Pacifica,” called a sharp voice, and Pacifica snapped to attention, looking up at the man looming over them.

“Father,” she greeted.

“Father?” Mabel echoed in surprise, and then flashed her most charming smile at the man. “I’m Mabel Pines, it’s nice to meet you, Mr. Northwest.” She held out her hand for him to shake, but he ignored it, sniffing haughtily as he did so. Mabel felt her spirits sink and let her hand drop.

“Why are you spending time with _riff-raff_ , darling?” he asked. “Your friends may not be here, but Rebecca Chansey is in town…”

Pacifica sighed. “Yes, father,” she said obediently, and slid off the bench. She glanced at the cousins miserably and tried to offer a comforting smile. “Goodbye…”

Mabel sat and watched as Pacifica made her way over to the library with her father. From the way she was walking, you’d never guess that she was upset, but Mabel had seen it in her eyes when she’d bade them goodbye.

“Wow, he was…” Dipper trailed off, not finishing his sentence. Mabel took the opportunity to finish it for him.

“A massive jerk! Why does he think he can be so _rude_?”

“They’re the richest people in town,” Dipper pointed out. “ _And_ they’re related to the town founder. They practically own the place.” Mabel scowled.

“It doesn’t mean he should be so rude!”

Dipper paused for a moment, thinking. “You know… I think Ford mentioned something about Nathaniel Northwest once. Some kind of conspiracy. We could try and find out more, if you want?”

Mabel brightened considerably. “Okay!” she chirped, and slid from the bench. She grabbed Dipper’s hand and pulled him down to stand beside her, looking around the busy town square. “Now where could he be…?”

* * *

Ford was not having a good day.

Not only had he been dragged out of the house, away from his research and his work and the portal, into a busy, crowded place full of people (that he could hurt kill terrorise no don’t think stop), he’d also been locked into an uncomfortable position with the sun glaring straight in his eyes. At this point, he was half wishing that Bill _would_ show up, if only so he wouldn’t have to stay stuck here anymore.

“Uncle Ford!”

Ford glanced up to see Mabel running towards him, pulling Dipper along.

“Mabel, Dipper,” he greeted. “Are you two okay?”

“We’re fine!” Mabel said, skidding to a halt. “What happened to you?”

“I was… detained, as a result of my outfit.”  
“Wh-aaat?” Mabel cried. “But you put in so much effort!”

Ford frowned. “What do you mean? I just pulled on the first thing I found… Anyway, it was too nineteenth-century for these fools’ taste, so I was arrested on suspicion of being a time traveller.”

Dipper smacked his face. Mabel gasped. “That’s so cool! But also terrible. Do you think there are really time travellers?”

“I can’t say I’ve ever come across one,” Ford told her, “But I wouldn’t rule out the possibility.”

“Nice!”

“Mabel…” Dipper said, giving her a _look_. Mabel startled.

“Oh, right! Uncle Ford, what do you know about Nathaniel Northwest?”

“Nathaniel Northwest?” Ford echoed. A memory sprung into his mind. “Oh, _him_. I have reason to believe that he was not actually the town’s founder, but rather a fraud.”

Mabel’s eyes widened. “Really?”  
“Yes, well, I couldn’t find any conclusive evidence. There was a document that must have contained the secret, but I couldn’t figure it out. Eventually I gave up on it, having more important matters to attend to.”

“Could we have a crack at it?” Mabel asked.

“Well, I don’t see why not.”  
“Yay!” Mabel cheered, before pausing. “Wait, where’s this document?”

“It’s in one of my journals… I think there’s one in the pocket of this coat, take a look.” Mabel walked forward and grabbed the book from Ford’s pocket, grabbing it and flicking through it. “There!” Ford said suddenly. Mabel paused and flipped back a couple of pages, finding a short page of writing and an attached document. She pulled it out, then shut the book and put it back.

“Thanks, Uncle Ford!” she said. Ford nodded.

“Well, you’re very welcome. Let me know if you do discover anything!” He smiled, and then frowned. “Though, isn’t it a little strange that I had the right book in my pocket? Why would I even have it in there? This seems a little too deus ex machina to be believable.”

“I don’t know what that means,” Mabel said, not looking up from the document. “But I’m pretty sure it was just coincidence and good ol’ dumb luck.” She folded the page back up and tucked it into her pocket, flashing him a smile. “See you, Uncle Ford! Come on, Dip!” She grabbed Dipper’s hand and the two of them went racing off through the crowd. Ford watched them go and sighed. A thought suddenly came to mind.

“Wait!” he called after them. “Kids, come back! Get me out of here!” They were gone. Ford sighed, leaning back as much as he could. “Sometimes I really hate this town,” he muttered.

“Well, well, well,” said a voice. Ford looked up to see a figure silhouetted against the sun, features indiscernible- but he didn’t need them to know who it was. He’d know that hair, that voice, anywhere.

“Gideon,” he sighed.

“Stanford Pines, what a surprise seeing you here!”  
“What do you want, kid?”

“Oh, nothin’,” Gideon said smoothly. “I’m just a simple potato farmer, here to sell my wares… Whoops, I dropped one.” Ford winced as a tomato hit his face and exploded.

“Today is going to be a long day.”

* * *

“I’ve seen this code before,” Dipper said as he pored over the document. “But where?” He flipped through a book at his side, frowning.

“Hey guys,” greeted a new voice, and Mabel looked up in surprise.

“Pacifica! I thought your dad told you not to talk to us?”  
“He did, but… He went out to talk to someone or something, and I managed to ditch Rebecca Chansey, so I thought I’d come see what you’re doing.” She frowned. “What _are_ you doing?”

“My uncle gave us a document to uncover the conspiracy about the true founder of Gravity Falls!” Mabel told her excitedly. “Do you wanna join us?”

Pacifica shrugged. “Sure, I’ve got nothing better to do…”  
“Yay!” Mabel reached out and grabbed her hand, tugging her closer. Pacifica was pulled over with a small yelp, and after regaining her footing, sat down on the bench next to Mabel. “This is the document,” Mabel said, pulling the paper over. Pacifica took it and looked it over.

“Huh,” she said. “What do these symbols mean?”

“We don’t know,” Mabel admitted. “That’s what we’re trying to figure out. How’s it going, Dipdop?” she called. Dipper glanced up, his finger pausing on the book’s page.

“I can’t figure it out,” he admitted. “It’s not Egyptian, or numerology, or- oh! Of course!” He glanced back down at the book and flipped several pages. “Alchemy symbols! The triangle is the symbol for fire, which means… which means…” Dipper went still. Mabel glanced up, frowning in concern.

“Dipper? You okay?”

Dipper glanced up and his eyes widened. “Mabel!” Mabel glanced down and saw that she’d folded the document up into a paper hat.

“Oh no…” she mumbled. She glanced back up again. “I’m so sorry Dipper, I didn’t realise I was doing it!”

Pacifica took it from Mabel’s hands, going to straighten it out, when she paused. “Wait, guys,” she said, “Look. It’s a map.”

“What?” Dipper asked in confusion.

“Look!” Pacifica said, and slid it over to him. Dipper picked it up and looked at the map.

“This is the town,” he said, half to himself. “And this leads…”  
  
“Welcome to the Gravity Falls Museum of History!” The woman smiled at them. “Here are your free Pioneer Day passes, and your balloons, purple, blue, and pink.”  
“What’re we gonna do now?” Mabel asked as the three of them made their way through the museum. “Steal Walt Disney’s head?”

“Eww, no,” Pacifica said in disgust.

“That’s not even here,” Dipper added, not looking up from the map. “According to this, the next clue should be right… around… here!”

“Well that’s… nice…” Pacifica commented as they stared at the abstract stone carving.

“We have to figure this one out quick,” Dipper said. “Remember those cops at the library? I don’t think they were there to check out books.”  
“I don’t think the tall one can even read,” Pacifica agreed. “But what could it be?” She tilted her head to the side slightly, staring. Beside her, Dipper’s eyes scanned over the carvings of stone, trying to decipher some kind of pattern or code.

“This makes no sense,” Mabel complained, hanging upside-down on the bench.

“It won’t do if you’re not trying to understand it,” Pacifica pointed out, turning to raise an eyebrow at her.

“I _am_ trying,” Mabel said. “It’s not my fault that it’s stu- oh!”  
“What?” Pacifica asked.

“Come look!” Mabel urged. Pacifica hesitated.

“I’ll look silly,” she said.

“So what?” Mabel asked. “It’s okay to be silly, Pacifica. I mean, I’m silly all the time, and look at me!”

Pacifica took in her homemade 19th century dress, light-up sneakers, and nacho earrings. “That’s not very reassuring.” Mabel snorted.

“Well, whether you’ll look silly or not, it doesn’t matter, because this thing makes sense if you look at it upside down!”

Dipper and Pacifica shared a glance. Dipper shrugged and hopped onto the bench, twisting into the same position as Mabel. Reluctantly, checking to see that no one was watching, she did the same.

“Oh,” she said. “It’s an… angel?”  
“We should follow the arm,” Dipper said. “See where it’s pointing.”  
“No, that’s not it,” Mabel said. “That’s a statue in the cemetery.”

“It is?” Pacifica asked.

“How do you know that?” Dipper questioned. Mabel laughed nervously.

“Haha, no reason… Anyway, come on! We should get out of here, quick, before the cops come.”  
“She’s right,” Pacifica agreed. “I can’t get a criminal record, my parents would _kill_ me.”

The three of them clambered down from the bench, before being hit with a sudden wave of dizziness.

“Ow, ow, ow.”

“Headrush.”

“ _Bad_ idea.”

* * *

The three of them burst into the room at the bottom of the booby-trapped corridor.

“That was terrifying,” Pacifica gasped as they all stood for a moment, gasping, struggling to catch their breaths. “Are _all_ of your adventures like this?”

“Pretty much,” Mabel agreed. She stood up and wandered through the room, looking around curiously. “Wow, this is like, a treasure trove of historic-y, secret-y things.” She picked up a file that was lying around. “Oh, man! Benjamin Franklin _was_ secretly a woman!”

“Oh hey, here,” Dipper called, holding up another file which read _Northwest Cover-Up._ The others gathered around. “Ready to see who the real town founder was?”

“Yes!” Mabel agreed.

“No,” Pacifica whispered, but was drowned out by Mabel’s louder cheer. With nobody hearing her protest, the file was opened within a moment.

“ _Let it be here recorded,_ ” Dipper read, “ _That Nathaniel Northwest, fabled founder of Gravity Falls, was, in fact, a fraud… As well as a waste-shovelling village idiot?”_

“Ouch,” Mabel winced. “Sorry Pacifica.”

“Well, there goes my worldview,” Pacifica said, her head spinning. “If my great-grandfather didn’t found this place, who did?”

“It says here,” Dipper said, pointing. “ _The true founder of Gravity Falls was sir lord, Quentin Trembley III, esquire._ ”

“What was he, British?” Mabel asked.

“He was a matter of national security.”  
The three of them spun around to see the two police officers stood in the doorway.

“Oh no.”

The taller one dropped to the ground, and his partner gave him a calm glance. “He got hit with one too many of those darts.” He looked back up at the three of them. “Now, I’m going to have to transport you to Washington. And once you’re there, you ain’t ever coming back.”  
“What?! Why?!” Mabel cried. “What’d we done!”  
“Quentin Trembley is one of this country’s most hidden secrets, and nobody who knows it can possibly be allowed to walk free. I’m sorry, kids, but you know too much.”

“Please!” Pacifica cried, taking a step forward. “Sheriff Blubbs, it’s me, Pacifica Northwest! Surely you can let _me_ go?”

“Pacifica Northwest?” Blubbs said. “Well, this changes things.”

Pacifica gave a relieved smile. “Why would I tell anyone this?” she asked him. “It would just ruin my reputation, after all. So you’ll let me go, and I’ll never tell anybody, and my parents won’t have to get involved.”

“Sounds like a plan!” Blubbs agreed, stepping out of the way. “Off you go, Miss Northwest. Be careful on your way out!”  
“I will,” Pacifica gave him a gracious smile and nod.

“Pacifica!” Mabel cried behind her. “What about us? You can’t just leave us!” Pacifica glanced back and gave a sorry smile.

“Sorry, Mabel,” she apologised. “My parents can’t know about this. I have to save my own skin first.”

“Pacifica…”

“Today was fun, though. I’m sorry it had to end like this.” She turned and made her way back up the tunnel. Mabel stared after her, devastated.

“Now,” Blubbs said, resuming his stance in front of the exit. “Let’s get you two out of here.”

* * *

Mabel glanced over at Pacifica as they made their way back through Gravity Falls. Dipper followed her gaze. “Do you want to go and say something to her?” he asked. Mabel shook her head.

“No,” she said. “I don’t have anything to say to her.”

Dipper nodded, looking concerned at her dismal expression. He reached out and took her hand, squeezing it and taking her by surprise. She glanced back and smiled at him, squeezing back. Around them, the townsfolk were beginning to pack up for the day.

“Let’s get out of here,” she said. The two of them stopped by the stocks, where Ford was still trapped, only now he was covered in the juices and pulps of various vegetables.

“Bad day?” Dipper asked as he used the president’s key to unlock the stocks. Ford stood up, rubbing at his wrists and wiping at his face.

“Like you wouldn’t believe. Let’s go and find Stan. How did you mystery-hunting go?”

The two of them told him the story as they made their way over to the store. As they got there, Mabel was just wrapping up the tale, and Stan was closing shop for the day.

“Hey Dad!” Mabel greeted, waving. “Look, I got a hat!”  
“That’s nice, sweetie,” Stan said with a tired smile. He then got a look at Ford, and his eyes widened, a smile tugging at his lips.

“So, uh, what happened to you?” Ford gave him a dirty glare.

“Don’t ask,” he grumbled. “Let’s just get out of here.”  
Stan couldn’t stop himself from laughing this time. “Sure thing, Poindexter.”

“Next time, I’m staying at home.”  
“That’s fine, I won’t pester you to, if you’ll just do one thing for me…” Stan said, rummaging through the glove box.

“What?” Ford asked in confusion.

“Say cheese!” Stan said, turning around and snapping a photo of Ford. Ford glared at him.

“Stanley!”  
Stan laughed, pulling the picture from the old polaroid camera and shaking it. He grinned as the picture came into existence. “Oh, man, that’s perfect. That’s a keeper, that is. Mabel, you’ll have to add this to your scrapbook.” Mabel grinned.

“Definitely!”

Ford glanced between his family, Stan’s sniggering and Mabel’s giggles and Dipper’s small smile, and sighed. It seemed he was outnumbered.

He’d always been told that if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em, and  so, tentatively, he smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was so, so much fun to write. It would have been done earlier, but I went on holiday on Wednesday and only just got back today, so I only just had chance to write it. The next update might be a little slower too, because school starts Tuesday and I'm going to be busy, starting a new school and all that. And for the rest of you who are back at school/will be heading back soon, good luck! You can do it, I believe in you!
> 
> I don't have much to say about this chapter, but one thing I do have something to say about is Ford's outfit. As I was writing, I was messaging my friend Matt, and we started talking about this fic, and Matt suggested that Ford wear something that, in modern standards, is hilariously old-fashioned, but to the Pioneer Day people, would be futuristic, so that he'd end up looking like "an overconfident time traveller". As I needed a reason for him to be in the stocks in Stan's place, I was like "sure", and so I googled "19th century clothing" as to have a reference. And what else do I find but this thing https://www.heritagecostumes.com/secure/images/products/9444.jpg. Just look at it. It's so horrendous it's amazing, and that is the outfit Ford is wearing in this chapter. 
> 
> And then an anonymous commenter pointed out that the town was founded in the 19th century and neither of us could read. So I did some editing, and now it should all work! (AKA, Blubbs and Durland are just as stupid as us.)
> 
> (Also, if you draw Ford wearing it I may just love you forever).
> 
> That's all for today! Next chapter, an actual time traveller makes an appearance.


	9. The Time Travelling Pig

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “That is no pig,” interrupted a third voice, and the two of them turned to see a large, bald man stood ahead of them, between the trees.  
> //
> 
> A dream, a pig, a time traveller.

Dipper tossed and turned, mind drifting somewhere on the line between wakefulness and sleep. He could feel the sheets around him, knew that he was thrashing around, knew that, in reality, he was safe; he just didn’t feel that way.

His dreams were strange and insubstantial, incoherent and confusing. There was a snatch of Mabel’s laughter, a flash of Stan’s teeth, the crease of Ford’s mouth, the glow of Bill’s eyes. There was the forest, and the racing of his heart and the heaving of his chest and the pounding of his footsteps as he made his way through it, running like there was something chasing him, like he would die if he stopped. There was a scream, a flash of blood, the taste of tears, the sting of healing ointment. There was the warmth of someone’s hand in his, of arms wrapped around him in a tight hug, of walking into the house from the cold, of fire. There was the coolness of falling snow, of water rushing by his ankles, of the empty house, of neglect.

And throughout it all was a voice calling to him, haunting and melodic and  _ achingly _ familiar.

“ _ Ursa _ ,” it called, echoing all around him, echoing within him, the sound resonating through his bones. “ _ Ursa, come  _ home.”

He opened his mouth to ask where, but he couldn’t move his face. No sound escaped him, and his question went unheard, went unanswered.

“ _ Ursa _ .”

He woke up.

Gasping for air, he pushed himself up, looking out over his room. It was mostly bare, containing nothing but a single bed and a dresser, with several books and papers littered around. The door was carved with a large sigil, a triangle with an X over it. In each corner, moonstones were embedded, charging it. Morning light filtered through the window, which was also marked with an X. 

Calming down, his breath began to slow. He pushed his hair back, his fingers tracing over the lines of the constellation on his forehead. He looked down at his arms, at his legs, at his bedsheets flung haphazardly around by his struggling. A sigh escaped his throat.

Somewhere, someone called, “ _ Ursa _ .”

* * *

“So, where are we going, exactly?” Mabel asked as Dipper packed a bag. The two of them were in the reading room, with Dipper leaning over the counter and Mabel sitting on it.

“I don’t know,” Dipper said, not looking up.

“Oh, okay! So it’s an adventure?”   
“I guess,” Dipper agreed. He closed the bag and straightened up, slinging the bag over his shoulder. He paused, thinking for a moment, staring at the door. “There’s someone calling me. I think they’re in the forest. I want to- no, I  _ need _ to find out who they are. What they want.”

“You must have pretty good ears, I can’t hear anything!” Mabel said. “Come on, Dipdop, let’s go find this mysterious person!”

“I don’t think it’s a person,” Dipper said, taking a breath. “But yeah, let’s go!”

“You’re leaving?” interrupted a voice, and the two of them turned to see Ford stood at the door. He looked as if he’d gotten about as much sleep as Dipper, with dark bags under his eyes and a hunch to his gait. 

“Yeah, Uncle Ford, we’re going out for a walk!” Mabel said with a comforting smile. “We’ll be back later, okay?”   
“O-Okay,” Ford agreed. His eyes flicked between them quickly, too quickly, to the point where it was unnerving. “Just… Just be back before dark, okay?”   
“Okay, Uncle Ford. We’ll be back. Right, Dipper?”   
“Right,” Dipper agreed. He tried a smile at Ford, and Ford seemed to relax slightly, though he continued to twitch. “You should… you should get some sleep.” Ford opened his mouth to retort, glanced at Mabel, and hesitated.

“...You’re right,” he said eventually. “I should go… to bed. Be safe, kids.” He shuffled back down the hall, the curtain falling behind him and obscuring him from view.

“Wow, he’s a mess,” Mabel commented as she made her way over to the door. “I guess there was a reason Dad always told me not to stay awake too late.” She paused at the door. “Dipper? Are you coming?”   
“Yeah,” Dipper agreed, turning, tearing his eyes away from the doorway. “Yeah…” He walked over and followed her, lost in his thoughts. He could tell what Ford had wanted to say to him, before he’d censored himself for Mabel’s sake:  _ Can’t sleep. _ And that meant…

It was going to get bad again. That was all Dipper could think about as the two of them made their way into the woods, unable to pay attention to Mabel’s chatter as he usually would. He had hoped, with her and Stan being here, that would be enough, enough to keep Ford grounded. To stop him from falling into another bad spell. He guessed it hadn’t- and he’d been doing so well, recently, too…

He glanced down, bit his lip, tugged at his sleeves.

Somebody called,  _ “Ursa.” _

* * *

Ford shuffled his way down the hall, feeling blinded even in the dim light. The walls seemed to shift and sway around him, or maybe that was him, shifting and swaying on his feet, unable to walk straight. Not paying attention, he found himself in the newly-christened TV room, and grabbed onto the chair in order to steady himself. The world steadied with him.

Slowly, carefully, as if it might bite him, he sank down into the chair. It enveloped him, and he found himself sinking into it, and for a moment, he thought it might swallow him whole; but then it solidified, and he was fine, if just a little breathless and disoriented.

_ Can’t sleep.  _ The words echoed around his mind.  _ Can’t sleep. Trust no one. Can’t sleep. Trust no one. _

He found himself relaxing against his will, his body betraying his mind with its need to rest and recharge. He couldn’t think properly, mind clouded with sleep, and the words repeated in his head, a twisted lullabye.

_ Can’t sleep. Trust no one. Can’t sleep. Trust no one. Can’t sleep. Trust… _

* * *

Mabel found herself distracted as she wandered through the woods, her attention caught by a flower here, a rock there, a creature hiding somewhere in the undergrowth. She couldn’t help it; the last couple of times she’d been the woods, she hadn’t really had time for sightseeing. Dipper and Ford had always told her this place was dangerous, but they’d never mentioned just how beautiful it was, too.

“Mabel, are you coming?” Dipper called, a fair bit ahead of her now. Mabel turned around and nodded.

“Yeah!” she called, running to catch up. “This place is really pretty, isn’t it?” she asked as she fell into step beside him. Dipper glanced around.

“I… I guess? I don’t know, I never really paid attention to it before.”

“Well, that simply won’t do,” Mabel said, tugging on his arm and bringing them both to a halt. “Look, just. Close your eyes. Breathe.  _ Listen _ .”

“Mabel…” Dipper looked unsure. Mabel gave him her best puppy-dog eyes.

“ _ Please _ ?”

He sighed. “Fine.” He closed his eyes. Mabel watched as he breathed, in-and-out, in-and-out, in-and-out. She closed her own eyes, listened to the birds call and the wind rustle the leaves and the footsteps of tiny animals pattering nearby. After a moment of restless shifting, she opened her eyes and grabbed on Dipper’s hand. 

“Okay, now open them!”

Dipper gasped, his eyes snapping open. “Wha- Mabel!”   
“Come on, you can’t appreciate the beauty of this place  _ fully _ with your eyes closed.”

Dipper still looked disgruntled, but sighed, allowing her to pull him along. He began to pay attention as she pointed out all the cool things, and would sometimes chime in and tell her what a certain plant could do, or where that animal came from, or the age of that tree, or the properties of that crystal. 

Mabel found herself enjoying this, their exploration through the forest, when suddenly,  _ something _ erupted out of the undergrowth and tackled her to the ground. She heard Dipper call her name in alarm, but it was soon drowned out by the sound of her laughter.

“Hey, hey, hey!” she cried, giggling. “Stop that, you!”   
“Is that a… pig?”

“Yup!” Mabel agreed, picking it up so that she could sit with it on her lap. “Aww, look! It’s even wearing it’s own little coat!”

“Do you think it got lost?” Dipper asked curiously as he knelt down beside her. “Wild pigs don’t usually wear clothes…”

“I’m gonna name it Waddles!” Mabel proclaimed, staring into its eyes.

“ _ That _ is no pig,” interrupted a third voice, and the two of them turned to see a large, bald man stood ahead of them, between the trees. Without even realising it, Mabel held the pig closer, the animal snorting softly into her arm as she did so.

“It’s not?” Dipper asked curiously. “It… It looks like a pig.”   
“It feels like a pig, too,” Mabel added, glaring distrustfully at the man. 

“You have been deceived,” the man said gravely. “That is not a pig, but rather a time criminal, escaped from time prison.”   
“Time criminal?” Mabel asked, at the same time as Dipper said,

“Time prison?”   
“Are you a time traveller?” Mabel asked. The man froze.

“Time dangit!” he swore. “You figured me out!”   
“It wasn’t exactly hard…” Dipper mumbled.

“But yes, exactly,” the man said, not hearing him. “I am Blendin Blandin, Time Anomaly Removal Crew year sñeventy-twelve.”

“Sñeventy-twelve?”   
“Removal crew?”   
“Yes. Normally hunting down a time criminal like this would be the job of the time police, but he’s been evading us for some time now. We needed all hands on deck.” He held his arms out. “So with that in mind, I’ll be taking him now.”   
Mabel shifted backwards slightly without realising. Beside her, Dipper tensed. “How do I know you won’t just eat him?” she asked suspiciously. “How do I know you’re  _ really _ a time traveller?”

Blendin sighed and pulled out a tape measure. “This is my time machine,” he told them. Mabel pulled a face.

“That? It looks like a tape measure.”   
“I’ll have you know it’s a highly sensitive piece of equipment-”

Mabel reached out and grabbed it from his hand, the green glow of the amulet’s power carrying it towards her. She crowed in victory as she snatched it from the air, holding it above her head. “Haha!”   
“No, don’t-” Blendin cried as she pulled the tape back. Mabel gave him a smile and let go, and suddenly, she wasn’t where she’d been a moment before.

* * *

Waddles- because that was his name now, he supposed, and it wasn’t the worst codename he’d ever had- was not having a good day.

Being on the run from various forms of law enforcement wasn’t exactly a new experience by now, and at this point, he had experience with escaping them. But the time police of this dimension- what dimension was this again?- were proving to be difficult to escape from.

And to top it all off, he’d somehow, inexplicably, been turned into a pig.

In all his years of interdimensional travel, he’d found himself in plenty of strange situations, but being transformed into a completely different species hadn’t been one of them. Well, it had to happen sometime, he guessed. And he was lucky enough that it had thrown most of his pursuers off his trail, with the exception of this one, who he was beginning to suspect was rather, well, not quite right in the head.

...Not that he could say much without being hypocritical. 

In fact, he couldn’t say much at all. As much as he’d retained the ability for advanced thought, he’d lost the ability to speak. And the ability to do most human things, it seemed. He hoped he could get away from these kids at some point- he really did need to find  _ what _ exactly had rendered him in this state, and figure out how to reverse it.

“Come on, Waddles,” the girl said into his ear, hugging him close, carrying him away from the time agent, and he found that actually, right now, he didn’t mind the help.

* * *

“So, Sixer,” Bill said, swirling a toxic-looking substance in a wine glass he’d conjured from midair, “When are you getting rid of them?”

Ford sighed. “They have to be gone by the end of summer. I told you that.  _ I told you. _ ”

“You did.” Bill narrowed his eye. “I still don’t think you should have let them stay in the first place, but the past is in the past, am I right?” He laughed. “You’re lucky I don’t hold grudges.” 

Ford could tell this was getting dangerous.  _ Pull back, pull back.  _ “I am,” he agreed. “I can, uh, try and speed up the process? If you want?” 

“Yes, that would be nice.”  _ It’s an order. _

Ford gave a nervous laugh. “Yes, I will… get right on that.” He swallowed nervously. His brain told him,  _ Shouldn’t have fallen asleep.  _

“Good,” Bill said cooly. “Really, it’s for the best. They’re dragging you down, Stanford! They’d try and stop our work, they wouldn’t understand! They’d think you were mad, dangerous.” He paused, and then laughed. “Oh right, you are! Anyway, this way, you don’t get distracted. This way, they leave, and  _ nobody gets hurt _ .”

Ford bolted awake, gasping. He stared blindly for a moment before his eyes focused on the dimly-lit TV Room. He looked around, breathing hard, feeling his heartbeat slow. A cold shiver crept its way down his back. Bill’s words still rang in his ears.

_ Nobody gets hurt. _

* * *

The cousins blinked into existence on the edge of the forest.

“Yay!” Mabel cheered. “We’re back! And we outran that guy!”   
“We probably just broke so many time-laws,” Dipper fretted. Mabel scoffed.

“Pssh, come on, it’ll be fine!”   
“You two!” Blendin shrieked. The two of them spun around to see him standing in between the trees, panting with exertion. 

“Uh oh.”   
“Do you have  _ any _ idea how many rules you just broke?!”

“Uhh…”   
“It was a lot, right? I’m genuinely asking, I wasn’t there.”

Suddenly two men appeared alongside him, both wearing the same futuristic clothing. “Blendin Blandin.”

Blendin shrieked. “The Time Paradox Avoidment Enforcement Squadron!”

“That’s right, and our phones have been ringing off the hook! There are settlers high-fiving in the eighteen hundreds, and calculators littered throughout eight centuries!”

“You’re under arrest for violation of the Time Traveller’s Code of Conduct.” The kids watched as Blendin was handcuffed and led away, protesting the entire time.

“It was those kids! And their leader, waddles!”   
“That’s a pig, Blendin.”

“I’ll get you for this! I will have my revenge!”

The three of them vanished. The cousins glanced at each other.

“Do you want to carry on looking now?” Mabel asked. Dipper shook his head.

“I- I can’t hear it anymore.” He gave a small smile. “Let’s just- let’s go home. It’s been a long day.”   
“That it has,” Mabel agreed. She checked her watch and gasped. “It’s only been an hour!”

“Really?” Dipper asked, yawning. 

“Yeah. Time travel, huh?”

“Time travel,” Dipper agreed. The two of them walked back toward the house. 

“So, what’re you gonna do for the rest of today?”

Dipper shrugged. “I don’t know. I might just read. You?”

“I’m gonna knit Waddles a load more clothes! He looks so cute in his little coat, I wanna make him an entire wardrobe!”   
“Well, have fun,” Dipper said, pulling the door open. “Just be careful. Isn’t he supposed to be a criminal?”   
Mabel stopped and gave him a serious look. “He’s a pig, Dipper.”

Dipper broke out into a smile. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.” He glanced up as Ford made his way through the curtains. Ford paused, too.

“Oh, Dipper, Mabel, greetings.”

“Hi, Uncle Ford!” Mabel chirped. “Did you get some sleep?”

Ford nodded. “Yes, I did actually.” 

“That’s great! Hey, Uncle Ford, I found a pig wearing a coat, can I keep him?” She held waddles up for him to see. Ford paused, and looked at the pig, and then shrugged.

“I don’t see why not. Just don’t let him eat anything, and make sure to ask Stan, as well. You’re taking it with you when you move out.”   
Mabel beamed. “Yay! Thank you, Uncle Ford.”   
“You… You’re welcome, Mabel.” He turned toward the bookcase door and pulled it open, heading down the the lab. Beside Mabel, Dipper took a step forward.

“Hey, uh, Ford?” Ford paused and glanced back. “Can I… Can I help? It’s… It’s been a while?”   
Mabel thought Ford would refuse, but then he hesitated, and a look of resignation crossed his face. It was one of the softer expressions he wore, Mabel thought. He didn’t look annoyed, just tired, just worn down. It made Mabel want to hug him. 

“Sure,” he agreed. Dipper flashed Mabel a quick smile, raised his hand in farewell, and scurried after Ford. Mabel waved back, watching as the bookcase swung shut. Her smile fell.

“A wardrobe for waddles,” she muttered to herself, setting the pig down. “And a sweater for Uncle Ford.”

* * *

Waddles was severely missing the ability to write; it helped him to get his thoughts down on paper, to clear out all the mental clutter as he made it into physical clutter. He would just have to make do with pacing up and down the floor, timing his thoughts to the tapping of his hooves on the floorboards.

It seemed he would be stuck in this arrangement for a while. But that was alright, he supposed, because there were far worse fates than being trapped as someone’s pet pig. Far worse things he’d experienced, too. And well…

He had the feeling that if he stayed in this house long enough, he’d find his ticket out of here- or at least, out of this form.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would once again like to thank Matt for his brilliant and stupid ideas. I hoped you enjoyed waddles, because I enjoyed waddles.
> 
> I feel bad for introducing the conflicts with Bill's threats and the voice at least 10 chapters before I plan to actually resolve them, but, well, I had no idea what to write for this chapter. I'm considering combining some later episodes into one chapter, but... I don't know. I'm considering it. However, to make up for the unsolved mysteries introduced, I will be giving away spoilers in the comments of this chapter! I won't be too obvious, or straight up tell you things, but I'll try to drop hints. This offer only stands until the posting of the next chapter, so ask while you can.
> 
> You can also hmu on tumblr anytime @galaxyford.
> 
> Next Chapter: A visit to an arcade.

**Author's Note:**

> So, the timeline for this one is a little weird; I don't know when exactly Bill and Ford started working together, so this is just a. Rough estimation. If anyone does know, that'd be great. The basic explanation for this one is that Mabel is Stan's daughter, and Dipper Ford's son, and as such they were born a lot earlier. I want to try and follow a plotline similar to the actual show, but of course things will be different because of the changes needed for this AU to be possible. Most of the characters from the show (Gideon, Wendy, Pacifica, etc.) will be aged up as well, to match the ages they are in canon despite this fic taking place almost 20 years earlier. 
> 
> Now for some notes about characterisation: the biggest change in personality for this fic, I think, is Dipper. He's a lot quieter, more skittish and paranoid than canon Dipper, and there are reasons for that. For starters, Dipper grew up with Ford (and Bill, as will be explored in later chapters) in Gravity Falls; he's always known about the supernatural and the paranormal, has been studying it with Ford for as long as he's been studying anything. And because he's studying with Ford, he isn't going to school, or getting out much at all- Ford is still very much a recluse, and as such, Dipper doesn't get much interaction with other people, let alone anyone his age. As such, he's very out of touch with society and people in general, as can be seen in this first chapter. Mabel being in Gravity Falls, and being, well, Mabel, is going to help him open up and be less of a paranoid recluse.
> 
> Next chapter we'll see McGucket, and see how his life has gone in this universe, and we'll also have more bonding between the twins- the cousins, in this case. As for now, I hope you enjoyed the introduction to the story! There are big plans for this one, and I hope it lives up.


End file.
